Patrolling Los Angeles makes you wish it really was infested by gothic vampires. Hugs for Heather Poe [9.5/10]

*Ahehehm… Rats, we're rats, we're the rats. We prey at night, we stalk at night, we're the rats….


Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines is a strange game. The UI design coupled with the terrible opening cinematic might give the impression of a bad horror game, but this is far from that. In truth, VTMB is one of the best RPGs ever made despite being shipped in a god-awful technical state. See, this game was developed by Troika, a studio co-founded by Tim Cain (The creator of Fallout). Unfortunately, both Arcanum and VTMB performed terribly and Troika closed their doors in 2005. This was mostly Activision’s fault, as they rushed the devs to release their unfinished games to the public, tanking Troika’s reputation. However, as time passed their games earn themselves quite the cult following, and I first discovered Troika's work from one of Tim Cain’s YouTube videos. Within that video, Tim Cain said something along the lines of, “VTMB was the foundation for what would become Fallout: New Vegas”. Upon hearing this, I had to see what this game was about, and I'm honestly blown away by the sheer amount of detail in this little immersive sim. If you enjoyed the early 2010s Fallout games, I would HIGHLY recommend this game.


Artistic Vision : While admittedly, the graphics are dated, you must remember this game came out in 2004, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 2004, the same year Half-Life 2 was released. While this game is certainly behind Half-Life, it has the same artistic appeal to me. The facial animations are extremely detailed, and there’s a simple beauty to the low-resolution textures and thick atmosphere on display. Additionally, the Half-Life comparison is more appropriate than you might expect, because this game was made in the Source Engine. It’s for these reasons that this game feels nostalgic despite that fact I have never played it in my life. While there are other titles that look better, this game has its undeniable charm. Also.. If I'm being honest I prefer this games visuals over FNV, please don’t fight me. (*edit, the music is also pretty banging too)

RPG Systems : This is where this game truly shines, every single one of these systems flows brilliantly into each other. The main premise is that, *spoiler, you’re a vampire. As a blood-sucking creature of the night, you are at the mercy of your own nature. There’s a system called, “humanity”, which tracks your moral decisions, and when your humanity becomes too low you lose control of yourself. This is problematic because of this title’s gimmick, the "Masquerade”. See, vampire society is one of secrecy, it is crucial to those embraced that vampires are still believed to be fictional. Break the code of the Masquerade, and not only will you be hunted by humans, but your own kindred will try to "correct" your mistakes. I love this hook, and I haven’t even began talking about each of the playable vampire clans. There is so much replayability in this game, it practically demands it. Each clan has different abilities, positives and negatives which will DRAMATICALLY change how you approach this game. This isn’t even mentioning the customization you can get from the stat sheet alone, do you want to solve your problems with Melee? Guns? Seduction? Intimidation? Lockpicking? Or hacking? Seriously, this game puts most RPG’s to shame with the amount of unique playthroughs you can cook up. This is the single best reason you should give this game a shot. Also.. you can eat rats, 10/10.

Story : This story is nothing groundbreaking, however, it did put a smile on my face. It’s one of mystery, politics, and walking between worlds. The primary draw here is the differences between each of the vampire clans and their corresponding worldbuilding. If you’re the kind of person who gets hyped by lore, this game will not disappoint you. It’s honestly fun enough that I yearn for friends to play the TTRPG with.

Side Characters : I don’t have much to say other than I wish I could’ve spent more time with these guys. From Smiling Jack, to Damsel, to Jeanette, to LaCroix, to Nines, to Ming Xiao, all of these characters are lovable in their own ways. Sure, they’re not exactly the most unique characters out there, but man, the voice acting is so good that I was always happy to hear what they had to say. If you enjoy the characters and humor of Fallout, you’ll feel at home here.


Technical State : YOU NEED THE UNOFFICIAL PATCH, FOR REAL, NO JOKE, YOU NEED IT. As I stated earlier, this game was released unfinished, and if you try playing this game raw you will have a terrible time. Without the patch, you’ll be playing in 720p on 4:3 aspect ratio with bugs out the wazoo. Luckily, the fans has been updating the unofficial patch for literally two decades now, and it fixes 95% of the issues. That being said, you will still probably run into some frustrations, but at least the game is playable. Of all the criticisms towards this game, this is by far the most severe.

Jank : If you’re expecting good gunplay or good melee combat from this game, you will probably be disappointed. It's close to the feeling of New Vegas, but wonkier. Personally, I believe all the detail put into the RPG mechanics make up for the outdated combat, but I can see the jank being a problem for others. Nevertheless, where some men would see trash, others will see treasure, and I’m seeing all gold baby.

Level Design : If you know, you know, the Hollywood Sewers, AKA “The Warrens”, is straight out of Satan’s A$$H0LE. Multiple quests are either a nightmare to navigate or the systems barely work. There are a couple of mandatory stealth missions, and the stealth in this is just bad. Listen, between you and me, nobody will judge you if you look up a walkthrough or use wikis to help out, I know I did.


I would like to begin this section by giving some helpful tips to aid you on your first playthrough. Don’t play as a Nosferatu or Malkavian for your first time, both of these clans significantly hinge on the player's familiarity with the systems and are unique playthroughs worth savoring. Additionally, don’t put all your eggs into one basket, in the late game guns become very good and are absolutely worth investing in. Moreover, don’t underestimate how useful blood bags are. Don’t be like me, and make sure to save up most of your blood bags for the final mission, you’ll know when you get there.

TLDR All in all, Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines has become one of my favorite games. I recognize the numerous technical issues this game has, but it doesn’t matter to me because of how much charm is on the table. I’m planning on doing multiple playthroughs for each clan, and I can see my hours going into the hundreds despite a single playthrough taking about 30 hours. The RPG mechanics have aged wonderfully, and the World of Darkness has become one of my new favorite settings in gaming. It’s honestly astonishing to me that people don’t talk about this game, because it’s the ONLY piece of vampire media I’ve seen that doesn’t suck (pun intended). I’m just praying to god at this point that Bloodlines 2 can be half as good as this game. (Again, here’s your friendly reminder to DOWNLOAD THE UNOFFICIAL PATCH). Have fun kindred.

I've heard a lot of great things about VTMB over the years. After getting the chance to play it, I completely understand why it has such a cult following.

P.S. Make sure you download the Bloodlines Unofficial Patch!