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At the beginning of Steam Wumbo created the heavens and the server. Now the server was formless and empty. darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of Wumbo was hovering over the waters.
And then Wumbo said “Let there be graphics” and so there were graphics . Wumbo saw that the graphics were good and so he separated it from the missing textures. Wumbo called the graphics day and the missing textures he dismissed as the work of Seestra.
And so Wumbo said “Let there be a vault between the waters to separate water from water.” So Wumbo made the vault and separated the water under the vault from the water above it. And it was so. Wumbo called the vault “skybox.” And there was evening, and there was morning- the second round.
And then Wumbo said “Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so. Wumbo called the dry ground “land,” and gathered waters he called “seas.” And Wumbo saw that it was good.
On the third round Wumbo said, “Let there be lights in the vault of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark sacred times, and days and years, and let them be lights in the vault of the sky to give light on the earth.
As the fourth round arrived Wumbo spoke, “Let us make players in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the graphics.
Wumbo blessed them and said to them, “Be obedient and respawn in number, fill the server and subdue it.
And so it was Wumbo who created the server and all we know today, within four rounds. It was then That Wumbo took a break for the next three rounds to replenish his energy. And so on the seventh round Wumbo blessed the server and called it the wumbath. A day of wolyness.
Wumbo formed a terrorist from the dust of the round and breathed into his noistrils the power of Wumbology, and the terrorist became a living player.
Now the Lord Wumbo had planted a perfect map in the east, in the perfect server; and there he put the terrorist he had formed. The Lord Wumbo made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground-Trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food. In the middle of the map were the tree of health points and the tree of perfect ping and the tree of administrative powers.
The Lord Wumbo took the player and put him in the perfect map to work it and take care of it. And the Lord Wumbo commanded the player. "You are free to eat any melon in the garden, but you must not take from the tree of administive powers, for if you do, you will surely die.
The Lord Wumbo said, "It is not good for the Innocent to be alone. I will make another suitable for you."
Now the Lord Wumbo had formed out of the ground all the melons and all the chairs. He brought them to the player to see what he would name them; and whatever the player called them became so.
But for the innocent no suitable helper was found. So the Lord Wumbo caused the player to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took 100 of the players karma.Then the Lord Wumbo made a traitor from the karma he had taken from the inocent, and brought them to the player.
The player said,
"This is now karma of my karma
and flesh of my flesh
They shall be called traitor
for my karma was taken from me by them.
The innocent and his traitor were both covered in explosives, and they felt no shame for they were terrorists.
Now the serpent Seestra was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord Wumbo had. He said to the traitor. "Did Wumbo really say, "You must not eat from the tree of administrative powers?"
The traitor then said "We may eat from the trees in the map, but Wumbo did say "You must not eat fruit from the tree in the middle of the map, and you must not touch it, or you will die."
"You will not certainly die," the serpent Seesta said to the Traitor. "For Wumbo knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like Wumbo, knowing good and evil."
When the traitor saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye and also desirable for gaining absolute power, they took some and ate it. They also gave some to their friend, who was with them and they ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realised they were both strapped with explosies; so they took the explosives off.
Then the innocent and their traitor heard the sound of the Lord Wumbo as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord Wumbo among the trees of the map. But the Lord Wumbo called to the innocent, "Where are you?"
He answered, "I heard you in the garden, and I was afriad because I was without explosives; so I hid"
And he said "Who told you that you had explosives?" Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?"
The innocent said, "The traitor you put here with me- They gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it."
Then the Lord Wumbo said to the traitor, "What is this you have done?"
The traitor siad, "The serpent Seesta deceived me,and I ate."
So the Lord Wumbo said to the serpent Seesta, "Because you have done this,"
"Cursed are you above all players
and all wild animals!
You will crawl on your belly
and you will suffer high ping
all the days of your life
And I will put enmity between you and the traitor and between your offspring and theirs;
He will bobomb you
and you will strike his heel."
To the traitor he said
"I will make your pains in killing very severe;
with painful reprecussions when you are spotted.
Your desire will be for your innocent,
and they will rule over you.
To the innocent he said. "Because you listened to the traitor and ate fruit from the tree which commanded you, "You must not eat from it,"
"Cursed is the map because of you;
through painful toil you will try and maintain connection
all the days of your life.
It will produce unpredictable ping surges
and you will suffer from this.
By the sweat of your brow
you will eat your cursed melons
until you rturn to the map
since from it you were taken;
for dust you are
and to dust you will return."
With the administrative powers, the innocent forced spawned a new player, a detective. Later a new player was also forced spawned in who was another traitor.
Now the detective kept flocks of chairs, and the traitor worked on the melon fields. In the course of time the traitor brought some of the melons of his labour as an offering to the lord Wumbo. And the detective also brought an offering-Chairs of high quality, fit only for a God such as Wumbo. The Lord looked with favour upon the detective and his offering, but on the traitor his offering he did not look with favor. So the traitor was very angry and his face downcast.
Then the Lord said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, RDM is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it."
Now the traitor said to the detective, "Lets go out to the field." While they were in the field, The traitor bought a knife from the store and killed the detective.
Then the Lord Wumbo said to the traitor, "Where is the detective?"
"I dont't know," he replied. "Am I my fellow player's keeper?"
Then the Lord Wumbo said, "What have you done? Listen! Your fellow player's blood cries out to me from the ground. Now you are a curse and driven from the ground, which opened its mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hand. When you work the ground, it will no longer yield melons for you. You will be a relentless wanderer on the map.
The traitor said to the Lord Wumbo, "My punishment is more than I can bear. Today you are driving me from the map, and i will be hidden from your presence; I will be a restless wanderer on the map, and whoever finds me will kill me."
But the Lord Wumbo said to him, "Not so; anyone who kills you will suffer vengeance seven times over." Then the Lord enabled God mode upon the traitor so that no one could kill him.
Wickedness in the server
When the player base increased in number and traitors were picked, the innocents saw the traitors were suspicious, and they killed them as they chose. Then the Lord Wumbo said, “My spirit will not contend with players forever, for they are mortal; their play time will be five minutes.
The Lord Wumbo saw how great the wickedness of the player base had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the player thought was only evil all the time. The Lord Wumbo regretted that he had made players, and his heart was deeply troubled. So the Lord Wumbo said, “I will wipe from the face of the map the player base I have created and with them the barrels, the chairs and the melons- for I regret that I have made them.” But Venom found favour in the eyes of the Lord Wumbo.
Venom and the cleansing
“This is the account of Venom”
Venom was a righteous man, blameless among the players of his time, and he walked faithfully with the Lord Wumbo.
Now the server was corrupt in the Lord’s sight and was filled with rdm and admin abuse. Wumbo saw how corrupt the map had become, for all the people on the map had corrupted their ways. So Wumbo said to Venom, “I am going to put an end to all players, for the map is filled with rdm and admin abuse because of them. I am going to destroy both them and the server. So make yourself an ark of chairs; make rooms in it and coat it with pitch inside and out. This is how you are to build it; the ark is to be three hundred cubits long, fifty cubits wide and thirty cubits high. Make a roof for it, leaving below the roof an opening on cubit high all round. Put a door on the side of the ark and make lower, middle and upper decks. I am going to bring the rains of ddos on the server to destroy all life under the heavens, everything that has the breath of Wumbo in it. Everything on the server will perish. But I will establish my covenant with you, and you will enter the ark. You are to bring into the ark two of all chair types, barrels and melons, to keep them alive with you.”
Venom did everything just as Wumbo commanded him.
The Lord Wumbo then said to Venom, “Go into the ark, because I have found you righteous in this generation. Take with you seven pairs of every kind of clean chair, barrel and melon. Seven rounds from now I will send the rain of ddos on the server for forty rounds and I will wipe from the face of the map every living innocent, detective and traitor I have made.”
And Venom did all that the Lord Wumbo commanded him.
Venom was six hundred years old when the floodwaters came on the map. And Venom entered the ark, as Wumbo had commanded. And after the seven days the floodwaters came on the earth.
In the six hundredth year of Venom’s life, on the seventeenth round of the second game—on that day all the springs of the great deep burst forth, and the floodgates of the heavens were opened. And rain fell on the map for forty rounds.
On that very round Venom entered the ark. He had with him every chair and melon according to its kind, as Wumbo had commanded Venom. Then the Lord Wumbo shut him in.
For forty rounds the flood kept coming on the map, and as the waters increased they lifted the ark high above the map. The waters rose and increased greatly on the earth, and the ark floated on the surface of the water. They rose greatly on the map, and all the high mountains under the entire heavens were covered. The waters rose and covered the mountains to a depth of more than fifteen cubits. Every living thing that moved on land perished—innocent, detectives and traitors. Everything on dry land that had the breath of Wumbo in its nostrils died. Only Venom was left, and those chairs, barrels and melons with him in the ark.
The waters flooded the map for a hundred and fifty rounds.
But Wumbo remembered Venom and all the chairs, barrels and melons that were with him in the ark, and he sent a wind over the map, and the waters receded. Now the springs of the deep and the floodgates of the heavens had been closed, and the rain had stopped falling from the skybox. The water receded steadily from the map. At the end of the hundred and fifty rounds the water had gone down, and on the seventeenth round of the seventh game the ark came to rest on 67th street. The waters continued to recede until the tenth game, and on the first day of the tenth game the tops of the houses became visible.
After forty rounds Venom opened a window he had made in the ark and sent out a melon, and it kept rolling back and forth until the water had dried up from the map. Then he sent out a melon to see if the water had receded from the surface of the ground. But the melon could find nowhere to rest because there was water over all the surface of the map; so it returned to Venom in the ark. He reached out his hand and took the melon and brought it back to himself in the ark. He waited seven more rounds and again sent out the melon from the ark. When the melon returned to him in the overtime, there in its juiciness was a freshly plucked olive leaf! Then Venom knew that the water had receded from the map. He waited seven more rounds and sent the melon out again, but this time it did not return to him.
By the first round of the first game of Venom’s six hundred and first games, the water had dried up from the map. Venom then removed the covering from the ark and saw that the surface of the ground was dry. By the twenty-seventh round of the second game the map was completely dry.
Then Wumbo said to Venom, “Come out of the ark.” Bring out every kind of melon,barrel and chair that is with you-so they can multiply on the map and be fruitful and increase in number on it.”
Then Venom built an altar to the Lord Wumbo and, taking some of all the clean chairs, clean barrels and clean melons, he sacrificed burnt offerings on it. The Lord Wumbo smelled the pleasing aroma and said in his heart: “Never again will I curse the server because of players, even though every inclination of the player heart is evil from spawn. And never again will I destroy all living players, as I have done.”
Wumbo’s server rules with Venom
Then Wumbo blessed Venom, saying to him, “Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the map. The fear and dread of you will fall on all the innocents, traitors and detectives of the server; they are given into your hands. Everything that lives and moves about will be food for you. Just as I gave you the point shop, I now give you everything.
“But you must not eat meat that has its lifeblood still in it. And for your lifeblood I will surely demand an accounting. I will demand an accounting from every traitor. And from each innocent being, too, I will demand an accounting for the life of another innocent being.”
“Whoever sheds innocent blood,
by innocents shall their blood be shed;
for in the image of Wumbo
has Wumbo made playerkind.”
Then Wumbo said to Venom “I now establish my server rules with you and with your descendants after you and with every living thing that was with you—the melons, the barrels and all the wild chairs, all those that came out of the ark with you—every living thing on the server. I establish my server rules with you: Never again will all life be destroyed by the flood of a ddos attack; never again will there be a flood to destroy the server.”