𝐨𝐛𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐥𝐟𝐞𝐫.

VOICE
We want that money, Lebowski. Bunny
said you were good for it.

Hands haul the Dude out of the toilet. The Dude blubbers and
gasps for air.

VOICE
Where's the money, Lebowski!

His head is plunged back into the toilet.

VOICE
Where's the money, Lebowski!

The hands haul him out again, dripping and gasping.

VOICE
WHERE'S THE FUCKING MONEY, SHITHEAD!

DUDE
It's uh, it's down there somewhere.
Lemme take another look.

His head is plunged back in.

VOICE
Don't fuck with us. If your wife
owes money to Jackie Treehorn, that
means you owe money to Jackie
Treehorn.

The inquisitor hauls the Dude's head out one last time and
flops him over so that he sits on the floor, back against
the toilet.

The Dude gropes back in the toilet with one hand.

Looming over him is a strapping blond man.

Beyond in the living room a young Chinese man unzips his fly
and walks over to a rug.

CHINESE MAN
Ever thus to deadbeats, Lebowski.

He starts peeing on the rug.

The Dude's hand comes out of the toilet bowl with his
sunglasses.

DUDE
Oh, man. Don't do--

BLOND MAN
You see what happens? You see what
happens, Lebowski?

The Dude puts on his dripping sunglasses.

DUDE
Look, nobody calls me Lebowski. You
got the wrong guy. I'm the Dude,
man.

BLOND MAN
Your name is Lebowski. Your wife is
Bunny.

DUDE
Bunny? Look, moron.

He holds up his hands.

DUDE
You see a wedding ring? Does this
place look like I'm fucking married?
All my plants are dead!

The blond man stoops to unzip the satchel. He pulls out a
bowling ball and examines it in the manner of a superstitious
native.

BLOND MAN
The fuck is this?

The Dude pats at his pockets, takes out a joint and lights
it.

DUDE
Obviously you're not a golfer.

The blond man drops the ball which pulverizes more tile.