You might have come to this profile to rant about something or check what kind of person I am. So I respond with this info box.


No matter when, where, why... you are almost guaranteed to come across a discussion of some sort. I know I have. But having a civil discussion is difficult. Not because defending an opinion is hard, but convincing your opposing partner in such a way that you come across as mannered, skilled, even persuasive is exceptionally difficult. So people prefer to write harsh words, sarcasm and insults instead to defend their point.

It can be so much better though. It's called Steam Discussions for a reason. So, take some of these points with you:


1.: Stay calm, be friendly
Nothing convinces more than someone keeping his composure. Think about it, while many people start screaming at each other or throw insults, the one who reigns supreme is the one guy who keeps bringing points onto the table without any loss of composure. Not just does he come across more intellectual, he also provides the security of being able to have a normal discussion.

2.: Don't attack your opposing person
Kind of goes without saying, but nowadays has gotten more meaning than ever. The amount of times I've gotten myself in an argument where someone attacks my person, my way of acting, my style or anything about me, and doesn't focus his points on the actual matter, it makes discussing with those people exceptionally difficult. Not because I feel like I'm losing an argument, but because I know I can hold my ground in an argument without having to insult the other person.

3.: Consider the opposing opinion
It's not just about providing your point and defend it 100%. You should also leave some room for consideration of the opposing opinion. Show that you're open to consider the opposing side, make it clear you still stand for your own opinion until convinced otherwise. That way you'll come off as genuine.

4.: Convey your thoughts skillfully
Having an opinion is one thing. Being able to bring it across with convincing arguments is another. Think about what you say, write or talk about before you actually write it. Take a solid minute before talking, even take a few minutes before writing. Consider your words, consider your arguments and make sure none of what you say is offensive, degrading or even insulting. Make sure the points you make are sharp, on-point and clear.

5.: Make as little comparisons as possible
This is actually more effective that you think. When you have a discussion or leave feedback somewhere, you're tempted to say something like: "X does it better" or "Y makes this differently", but you're often greeted with "X is not this" - because ultimately, it isn't. What you're talking about is it's own thing. So instead of going about this like "X has a much better system", try something like this:

"I think this mechanic is kind of suboptimal because it makes the game a lot more stressful to play. You focus so much on keeping track of this mechanic that other systems kind of fall behind."

Of course, comparisons can be made in case you suggest something. Something like:

"It would be great if mining was somewhat easier, something like Terraria's Smart Cursor which would make it better"

Oh, by the way, really leave out IRL comparisons in games. Games is not IRL and we play games to escape reality, not turn it into another reality.