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85 of 85 (100%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Spring Fresh

Clean any map adequately
Unlocked 23 Aug, 2017 @ 11:09am

Employee of the Month

Get the Employee of the Month reward for your office
Unlocked 29 Aug, 2017 @ 8:28am

You're Fired!

Get fired!
Unlocked 12 Jul, 2015 @ 3:40pm

Blood Soaked

Spill 100 dirty buckets
Unlocked 14 Sep, 2017 @ 6:08am

Blaze of Glory

Incinerate 2000 items
Unlocked 6 Sep, 2017 @ 11:43am

Bloody Hell!

Mop up 10,000 splats
Unlocked 11 Sep, 2017 @ 2:03am

Who's for Dinner?

Get eaten
Unlocked 10 Sep, 2017 @ 1:09pm

Top Brass

Pick up 800 casings
Unlocked 13 Sep, 2017 @ 12:42pm

Taking Out the Trash

Pick up 1000 pieces of trash
Unlocked 15 Sep, 2017 @ 3:51am

Ubermensch

Speedrun a map with at least %25 par time to spare
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 9:34am

Pedestrian

Track over 20,000 footprints
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2018 @ 8:23pm

Janicide

Blow up a fellow worker with the help of an ominously bright-red explosive charge
Unlocked 20 Sep, 2017 @ 4:29pm

Need a Hand?

Receive a total of 35 helping hands from the Slosh-O-Matic
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2018 @ 8:20pm

Bins? Limbs!

Suffer the wrath of the Bin machine 75 times
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 7:35am

First Aid

Restock a total of 50 medkits over your cleaning career by punching out of levels with medkits
Unlocked 13 Sep, 2017 @ 8:55am

The Nose Knows

Use the Sniffer for a total of 2 hours
Unlocked 20 Sep, 2017 @ 6:43am

Chew on This!

Throw 100 items into sand traps
Unlocked 15 Sep, 2017 @ 8:29pm

Disintegrator

Fry 500 items with the plasma welder
Unlocked 21 Sep, 2017 @ 9:18am

The Mops Of Wrath

Complete Athena's Wrath Level
Unlocked 23 Aug, 2017 @ 11:09am

Anti-Virus

Complete Caduceus Level
Unlocked 7 Sep, 2017 @ 12:29pm

Ice-Cold Cleana

Complete Cryogenesis Level
Unlocked 14 Sep, 2017 @ 11:28am

Sandblasted

Complete Unearthly Excavation Level
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 6:30am

Pine Fresh

Complete Hydroponic Hell Level
Unlocked 14 Sep, 2017 @ 3:58pm

Surgical Sweeper

Complete Evil Science Level
Unlocked 27 Aug, 2017 @ 9:32am

Deep-Sea Dry-cleaning

Complete Paintenance Level
Unlocked 6 Sep, 2017 @ 10:03am

Operation Brownwash

Complete Waste Disposal Level
Unlocked 28 Aug, 2017 @ 3:31pm

Refined

Complete Unrefinery Level
Unlocked 7 Sep, 2017 @ 9:53am

One Mop To Rule Them All

Complete All major Official Levels
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 3:21am

Pass The Torch

Take a lit flare from a fellow Janitor
Unlocked 10 Sep, 2017 @ 10:04am

Louis and Clean

Complete Gravity Drive Level
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 3:21am

Big Banger Burnout

Tame the uncontrollable fury of the Big Banger by incinerating it
Unlocked 8 Sep, 2017 @ 12:58pm

Clean Freak

Cleanup your own personal Office by removing any Trash, Viscera and Blood; excluding trophies, then leave
Unlocked 20 Sep, 2017 @ 6:26am

Employee of the Year

Receive 12 Employee of the Month awards
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 10:11am

Identity Theft

Steal 30 or more Personal Identification Devices (P.I.Ds) from cleaned levels and take them to your office
Unlocked 12 Sep, 2017 @ 2:14pm

Bring the Thunder

Take the Big Banger Supernova out of Unearthly Excavation and into another work-site and turn it on
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 6:40am

Master of the Beats

Turn off the Big Banger while it's playing loudly(keep your music volume up too) in zero-gravity during a Solo game
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 6:42am

Plague Bearer

Transfer a Goo-Jar to another work-site and infect something
Unlocked 8 Sep, 2017 @ 12:56pm

Head Hunter

Collect a head from each species in cleaned levels and take them to your office
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 10:16am

Brushed Steel

Complete Revolutionary Robotics Level
Unlocked 15 Sep, 2017 @ 6:18am

Bushwhacked

Complete Overgrowth Level
Unlocked 9 Sep, 2017 @ 2:42pm

Bob's Legacy

Find Bob
Unlocked 15 Sep, 2017 @ 6:29am

"Red Keycard"

Unlock Bob's super secret secret stash room
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 6:31am

Keep It Secret, Keep It Safe

Find all the unique and hidden collectibles and return them to your office
Unlocked 19 Sep, 2017 @ 12:24pm

Eggregious

Find all the hidden painted eggs and return them to your office
Unlocked 18 Sep, 2017 @ 8:27am

Lost in Space and Time

Get consumed by an inter-dimensional crack in space-time
Unlocked 5 Jul, 2018 @ 1:42am

Wicked Unliving

Collect the chainsaw, boomstick, cursed hand and the evil book and return them to your office
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:51am

Thursday the 12th

Collect the mask and machete and return them to your office
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:51am

Bad Dreams on Helm Street

Collect the clawed glove and return it to your office
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:51am

Harroween

Collect the white mask and butcher knife and return them to your office
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:51am

The Shimmering

Collect the axe and return it to your office
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:51am

Never Put It On

Collect the ring and return it to your office
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:51am

House of Honor

Clean the entire House of Horror level
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:51am

Back From Whence It Came

Destroy the Bad Banger
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 5:50am

Not Quite a Lumberjack

Destroy 200 items in the woodchipper
Unlocked 6 Jul, 2018 @ 3:39am

Cleanliness is Godliness

Completely clean all mess in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 6:30am

Christmas Crisis Corrected

Completely clean Santa's Workshop without breaking any Christmas items and clock off
Unlocked 20 Sep, 2017 @ 7:21am

Sanitized Earth

Completely clean all mess and destroy every item in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked 19 Sep, 2017 @ 12:34pm

Bloody Incompetent

Prove your incompetence by leaving a worse mess in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 9:49am

St. Nick's Boomstick

Collect Santa's shotgun and bring it back to your office
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 5:30am

The Red Nose Knows

Collect the iconic reindeer nose and bring it back to your office
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 5:30am

Rooks Kept

Collect the different Rooks Keep figurines and take them back to your office
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 5:30am

Ballistic Weaponry

Collect the different Ballistic Weapons toys and bring them back to your office
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 5:35am

Thunder Candle

Requisition a new replacement janitor through the use of TNT
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 9:41am

Head Hunter

Collect elf heads and bring them back to your office, you freakin' psycho!
Unlocked 17 Sep, 2017 @ 5:30am

Santa Hats Must Die!

Incinerate 50 Santa hats, the symbol of everything you hate
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 10:30am

Tower of Babel

Build a stack of 10 stools
Unlocked 20 Sep, 2017 @ 6:55am

The Day the Funk Died

Bring about the sad meeting of Ice-Cold Banger and fire
Unlocked 16 Sep, 2017 @ 9:39am

Cold Storage

Complete Frostbite Level
Unlocked 7 Sep, 2017 @ 2:21am

Biomassive Breakdown

Complete Incubation Emergency Level
Unlocked 12 Sep, 2017 @ 2:14pm

Sanitary Supremacy

Completely clean the entire Shadow Warrior temple level
Unlocked 6 Sep, 2017 @ 11:57am

Mr. Two Million Dollars

Collect the two million dollars of cold hard cash from the Shadow Warrior level all at once and bring it back to your office
Unlocked 6 Sep, 2017 @ 11:57am

Swept Under The Carpet

Complete Uprinsing Level
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2018 @ 11:42pm

Crystal Clear

Complete Core Sample Level
Unlocked 12 Jun, 2019 @ 6:37am

Pest Control

Complete Pestilent Penitentiary Level
Unlocked 13 Jun, 2019 @ 1:36pm

Bleach and Clear

Complete Penumbra Level
Unlocked 14 Jun, 2019 @ 12:03pm

Audacious Oddities

Find all the unique Collectibles in the Vulcan Affair and return them to your office
Unlocked 29 Sep, 2019 @ 7:36am

Lair Care

Clean the entire Vulcan Affair level
Unlocked 29 Sep, 2019 @ 7:36am

Teeth for Tunes

Bring about the unfortunate meeting of Double-Oh Banger and Shark
Unlocked 26 Sep, 2019 @ 1:23pm

Blood in the Water

Go for a swim with Sharks
Unlocked 26 Sep, 2019 @ 1:23pm

We're Gonna Need a Bigger Tank

Feed the ever hungry Sharks 500 items they can either devour or destroy
Unlocked 28 Sep, 2019 @ 6:25pm

Double-Oh Dumbass

Foolishly activate the Death Ray
Unlocked 26 Sep, 2019 @ 3:28pm

Locked In

Lock another player inside a holding cell where they belong
Unlocked 28 Sep, 2019 @ 5:49pm

Death From Above

Get turned into mist by an orbital beam weapon
Unlocked 26 Sep, 2019 @ 1:54pm

Cat-astrophe

Using an orbital beam weapon, destroy the symbol of your most hated overlord; cats!
Unlocked 26 Sep, 2019 @ 2:12pm

Orbital Bang-bardment

Allow the Banger to ascend to its rightful place among the heavens through the use of an orbital beam weapon
Unlocked 26 Sep, 2019 @ 3:28pm