You're gay

Oh, but I'm already love with you, and it's all your fault! I want to bring you home after a nice, mutual outing, you leaning your head into my shoulder as you laugh and walk home with me. Then we go back to my place, mama sees me with a girl as beautiful and as sweet as you and just lets me have it, we go in my room, and you push me on my bed. "Whoa, whoa, whoa!" I say. "Are you sure you want to do this? I was just thinking we would watch some funny YouTube clips (lol)!" "If I wanted to laugh, I'd be ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ my ex right now. *Begins the slow process of seduction.*" I stop you and say, "I just want to know you're in it for the right reasons. Ever since I got such a nice body by going to the gym all the time and benching in the top .001% of all men in the America, girls just ♥♥♥♥ me and don't want anything deeper than that. You're more than that, right?