Rod Serling, the creator of Twilight Zone, will tell You about next week's story after this word from our alternate sponsor.
And now Mr. Serling!

God said to John, "Come forth and receive eternal life."
But John came fifth and won a toaster.

I'm a little teapot, short and stout.
Here is my handle-- oh bugger, I'm a sugar bowl.

80% of married men cheat in America.
The rest cheat in Europe.