Recent reviews by cLoWnHaTe

So, I played FlatOut 3. Why? Because a YouTube video told me it was bad. And I'm easily influenced. Plus, the complete pack was cheap. Smart move, right? Wrong. I went straight to the dumpster fire that is FlatOut 3.

The graphics look like they were made by a potato. The handling is like trying to steer a runaway shopping cart full of kittens. And the AI? Let's just say they're enthusiastic about sending you into walls. Repeatedly.

But here's the thing: it's hilarious. The crashes are epic. Cars explode in a glorious mess of pixels. It's less of a racing game and more of a demolition derby simulator where everyone is trying (and failing) to win. It's so bad, it's good. Think of it as a comedic train wreck, but with cars.

If you're looking for a polished, realistic racing experience, run far, far away. FlatOut 3 is a chaotic mess, a digital demolition derby fueled by questionable physics and aggressively unhelpful AI. However, if you appreciate unintentional comedy and spectacularly bad crashes, and you can snag the Complete Pack at a reasonable price, it might be worth experiencing for the sheer absurdity of it all. Just don't expect a rewarding racing game.

Prepare yourself for a digital banana-fueled descent into madness. The core gameplay of Banana Clicker is deceptively simple: click a banana. But don't be fooled! A CPS counter mocks your clicking speed, while a merciless timer demands clicks every three minutes; miss a click, and you'll be denied your digital banana reward. This isn't just inconvenience; it's a constant, low-level anxiety.

There's no story, just a judgmental banana screaming "CLICK MEEEEEEE!" at you. The replayability is infinite torture—click, wait, click, wait—until you break. Rewards? A single, measly digital banana every three hours. Sell it? You'll probably get enough for a virtual gumball.

It's free, though, and that's a massive plus. The free banana is a bonus. Easy achievements are nice, and the tiny file size is convenient. But the repetitive gameplay and the sadistic timer will test your patience (and sanity!). If you enjoy masochistic clicker games and have a morbid curiosity, give it a try. Otherwise, maybe stick to something a little less... bananas. 4/10

Absolutely stunning! The art style is breathtaking, the music is beautiful, and the gameplay is surprisingly engaging. A short but unforgettable experience. Highly recommend!

Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice is a truly unique and unforgettable gaming experience. Its stunning visuals, haunting audio design, and deeply unsettling portrayal of psychosis create a powerful and emotionally resonant atmosphere. While the combat is relatively straightforward, the game's focus on atmosphere and narrative makes it a compelling and unforgettable journey. A masterpiece of atmosphere and storytelling, even if it's not a technically challenging game.

BioShock Infinite is a visually stunning and narratively ambitious first-person shooter. Its unique setting, compelling characters, and thought-provoking story make for a memorable experience. While combat can feel repetitive at times, the overall atmosphere and mystery surrounding Columbia are captivating enough to keep players engaged until the very end. A must-play for fans of atmospheric shooters and compelling narratives, even if the gameplay occasionally falters.

Wreckfest delivers chaotic, over-the-top demolition derby fun. The physics are realistic enough to be satisfying, yet forgiving enough to keep the crashes entertaining. While graphics aren't cutting-edge, the gameplay shines, offering a unique and addictive blend of racing and destruction. A solid choice for fans of vehicular mayhem.

This is arguably the best Naruto game ever created. It's a truly remarkable achievement, seamlessly blending accessible gameplay with stunning visuals and an incredibly engaging experience. From the moment you start, you're immersed in the vibrant world of Naruto, thanks to the breathtaking graphics and epic soundtrack. The character models are incredibly detailed, and the special effects during ultimate moves, such as the explosive spectacle of a Rasengan or the electrifying power of a Chidori, are nothing short of spectacular.

The combat system is surprisingly deep, offering a satisfying challenge for veterans while remaining accessible enough for newcomers to pick up and enjoy. Even players unfamiliar with the Naruto universe will appreciate the intuitive controls and the sheer spectacle of the battles. The sheer variety of abilities and jutsu, each with its unique feel and impact, adds significant replayability, encouraging experimentation and mastery of different fighting styles. The robust story mode also faithfully recreates key moments from the anime, adding another layer of enjoyment for fans.

Every aspect of the game feels carefully crafted as a tribute to Naruto fans, capturing the spirit and excitement of the anime perfectly. However, its appeal extends beyond the fanbase; the sheer quality of the visuals, the engaging combat, and the overall polish make it a must-play for any fan of action games. A masterpiece.

Alright, metalheads and demon-slaying maniacs, listen up! DOOM Eternal ain't just a game; it's a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ experience. This ain't your grandpappy's shooter; this is next-level carnage, a symphony of explosions and chainsaw screams. And let me tell you, it's absolutely awesome on the Steam Deck.

Gameplay: Forget walking; you're flying through this game. The movement is so slick, so fluid, you'll be dodging demons and blasting their faces off with the grace of a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ninja. The combat? Pure, unadulterated mayhem. It's a dance of death, a ballet of bullets and blood. Every weapon feels powerful, every kill is satisfying, and the glory kills? They're so over-the-top, so ridiculously awesome, they're practically performance art.

Graphics and Sound: This game looks like a heavy metal album cover come to life. It's brutal, it's beautiful, and it's dripping with style. The sound design is just as killer; the soundtrack is a headbanger's dream, and the sound effects are so visceral, you'll feel every shot, every chainsaw rev, every demon scream.

Story: Yeah, yeah, there's a story. Something about demons and hell and saving the world. But let's be real; nobody plays DOOM for the plot. We're here for the carnage, baby!

Overall: DOOM Eternal is a masterpiece of violent, glorious, adrenaline-pumping fun. It's a game that demands to be played loud, played aggressively, and played with reckless abandon. And the fact that it runs so smoothly and looks so great on the Steam Deck just makes it even better. This ain't just a 10/10; it's a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 11/10. Go get it. Now.

Run, gun, explode, repeat! Simple, brutal, and ridiculously fun. The pixel art is gorgeous, the sound is iconic, and the gameplay is pure, unadulterated awesome. A perfect blast from the past.

Story and Characters: Three dudes – a grumpy old geezer, a total psycho biker dude, and a young hustler – pull off bank jobs and cause absolute mayhem. Think Ocean's Eleven but way more bonkers. The plot's a rollercoaster, the characters are off-the-wall nuts, and the lines are funnier than a barrel of monkeys.

Gameplay and Open World: Los Santos is a giant playground – steal cars, mess with NPCs, and do stuff so ridiculous it's genius. Golfing? Yoga? Yeah, why not? Just remember to cause some serious ruckus.

Online Mode (GTA Online): Wanna be in a crazy car chase with 29 other lunatics? GTA Online's your jam. It's total chaos; anything goes (and usually does). Expect epic battles, hilarious glitches, and maybe a few salty rage quits. Unless you're rocking some serious mods, other players might try to school you. It's a total free-for-all, so be prepared to get your butt kicked (and dish it out too!). However, big downside: you can't play online through Steam Deck because of that pesky anti-cheat. Bummer, right?

Graphics and Sound: The graphics are still killer, even after all these years. Los Santos looks so real you'll forget you're not actually causing trouble IRL. The soundtrack is fire – the perfect tunes for all the crazy action.

Overall: GTA V is the bomb.com. It's hilarious and surprisingly deep, a chaotic adventure that'll keep you glued to your screen. It would be a solid 9/10, but that Steam Deck online issue and the anti-cheat shenanigans knock it down to an 8/10. Still a must-play, though! Seriously, go get it.