23 Funny Tweets From The Week Because The People Of Twitter Had JOKES

    "I wonder if shampoo and conditioner are friends irl or if it’s purely professional" —@benedictsred

    Alana Valko
    by Alana Valko

    BuzzFeed Staff

    Welcome back to another week of funny tweets! ICYMI, last week, Twitter made likes private, and it was a devastating day for anyone who has ever had a crush and those who like to be mysteriously perceived:

    likes are now private pic.twitter.com/Xt7ziR5u4D

    — X (@X) June 12, 2024
    Twitter: @X

    While Elon may continue to disappoint loyal Twitter users, he will never be able to take away their humor. Here are all the best tweets from last week:

    1.

    getting our biggest booth ready https://t.co/AjlIp6WJIt

    — Chili's Grill & Bar (@Chilis) June 10, 2024
    Twitter: @Chilis

    2.

    A meme features an iPhone message saying, "Tall friend: don’t eat chicken on the sidewalk we have chicken at home," followed by an image of a bowl of dog kibble labeled, "The chicken at home."
    Getty Images / @coreybrickley / Via x.com

    3.

    long pressing ur power button to force shut down a laptop feels like choking someone with a pillow to death

    — s (@escap1ngirls) June 9, 2024
    Twitter: @escap1ngirls

    4.

    The crunch of a caesar salad could heal a nation

    — alexa (@mariokartdwi) June 9, 2024
    Twitter: @mariokartdwi

    5.

    🚨 they gentrified Cookie Crisp 🚨 pic.twitter.com/YDKCcVEq1s

    — Raft ⚠️(they/them)⚠️ (@caitraft) June 12, 2024
    Twitter: @caitraft

    6.

    The nurse said she needed some urine to test for potassium. "K," I said. Silence. "I bet everyone makes that joke," I say. She's like "In 15 years of nursing not one person has made that joke"

    — sarah (@sarahradz_) June 12, 2024
    Twitter: @sarahradz_

    7.

    Told my fiancée that I cook when I'm stressed. Tell me why this lady looks me in the eye and calls me a pressure cooker 🥲

    — Billy (@tweetsbybilly) June 12, 2024
    Twitter: @tweetsbybilly

    8.

    sociopath behavior: went to a party last night and as it started winding down, a dude guilt-tripped a bunch of us into playing a “light, quick game” of Settlers of Catan

    — QuoProQuid (@TNOQuoProQuid) June 15, 2024
    Twitter: @TNOQuoProQuid

    9.

    They delivered 70 boxes of snacks and water for our summer program. I unloaded 3 hand trucks in like 15 min. The delivery guy gonna say “I was gonna ask for your number but you too strong and independent I’d rather just tell you we’re hiring” 😭😭😭😭😭

    — HER. (@Adore_Shay) June 12, 2024
    Twitter: @Adore_Shay

    10.

    i bought a new car battery and it was like $220 and the girl at auto zone said “wanna see how much it would cost if you needed 99 of them?” and i said “okay” so she typed 99 in the quantity and the price went to $23000 and she said “thats how much it would cost” and i said “okay”

    — buck tooth cunt (@Royal_McPoyle) June 13, 2024
    Twitter: @Royal_McPoyle

    11.

    When a goose gets their first car pic.twitter.com/LCD9ISXT4y

    — Kai (@Pai_Kage) June 13, 2024
    Twitter: @Pai_Kage

    12.

    My bf just sent me this photo of a dog sitting in first class on Air France pic.twitter.com/dLMaq8QFP3

    — Richard Lawson (@rilaws) June 13, 2024
    Twitter: @rilaws

    13.

    I love trains because I get to engage in one of my favorite hobbies: looking. God I love to look

    — Rachel Lapides (@rachellapides) June 14, 2024
    Twitter: @rachellapides

    14.

    ENOUGH 😭😭😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/KFTdVQ39yz

    — Ichigo Niggasake (@SomaKazima) June 13, 2024
    Twitter: @SomaKazima

    15.

    Holy fucking shit, Danny absolutely hated being in this wedding. Already at the thrift store pic.twitter.com/4oPWtGz098

    — bayou blastbeats (@alienantware) June 14, 2024
    Twitter: @alienantware

    16.

    I just remembered this tweet and I'm crying laughing https://t.co/ovqoR9T1HG

    — andie (@AndieIsOnline) June 12, 2024
    Twitter: @AndieIsOnline

    17.

    Tweet from Robert Barba reads: "That comma is putting in work today." Underneath, a tweet from Jacob Silverman reads: "Up First briefing: Hamas’ demands, Joey Chestnut out of hot dog contest."
    @Barbawire / NPR / Via x.com

    18.

    being sick in the summer feels like you’re the little boy with scarlet fever from the velveteen rabbit. my friends are at the beach and i’ve got my hand on the window pane. tomorrow i may burn all my possessions in a pit

    — old tom (@YuckyTom) June 13, 2024
    Twitter: @YuckyTom

    19.

    I wonder if shampoo and conditioner are friends irl or if it’s purely professional

    — Jason, ex Inferis (@benedictsred) June 14, 2024
    Twitter: @benedictsred

    20.

    So funny that leg hair just like stops… okay lol pic.twitter.com/W8EeZDLriZ

    — air mattress ashley (@countryguy4by4) June 16, 2024
    Twitter: @countryguy4by4

    21.

    Fcking obsessedddd with not plugging my phone in when I go to bed like… I’ll charge it sometime tomorrow ♥️♥️

    — Chölo Sevigny (@xXnarcissistXx) June 14, 2024
    Twitter: @xXnarcissistXx

    22.

    I had to spin the block. Look at this King. https://t.co/n7WuP7XbBP pic.twitter.com/DRh1jTr62J

    — 🌲 chris 🌲 (@zambonijonez) June 14, 2024
    Twitter: @zambonijonez

    23.

    I’ve come in possession of the best fishing hat in the world pic.twitter.com/s5hL2kcukx

    — Kate Whitaker 🏺☕️ (@kwhitaker_) June 15, 2024
    Twitter: @kwhitaker_

    For more funny tweets, check out our recent roundups (and don't forget to shoot these creators a follow if they made you laugh!):

    33 Hilarious Tweets From The Week Because Life Is Meant To Be Laughed At

    23 Funny Tweets From The Week Because If We're Living In A Simulation, We Might As Well Enjoy It

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