Here Is A Definitive Ranking Of The Best Gay Anthems Of All Time, And If You Disagree, You're Wrong

You haven't really heard this song until you've heard a drag queen slay it.

Straight people love this song. Like, a lot. But it’s our month and I’m reclaiming it as gay. As a little reward. 

"Make lots of noise! Kiss lots of boys! Or kiss lots of girls, if that's something you're into." She was genuinely brave for saying that. 

Canadian pop princess Carly Rae Jepsen put the secret gay sauce in this one, I’ll say that….

Adding this on the list because it personally contributed to my bisexuality and I’m the author of this list, after all. 

"I'D RATHER BE DRY, BUT AT LEAST I'M ALIVE" — me that one time at Pride where I spilt an entire lemonade onto myself.

If you disagree with this then you probably can't relate to a musical theatre duet about magic, friendship between two witches and overcoming adversity. And thus, this list isn't for you.  

Sorry, but I’m not gonna NOT put a Cher song on the GAY ANTHEM list.

Billie Eilish knew what she was doing when she released this sexy song about girls kissing girls right before Pride month....

Now this is a beautiful song about chosen family and I really relate to it because I, too, know a place that we can go (to dance).

A song that's about doing poppers and has a sexy music video? What other criteria do you need?

This record's message of self-acceptance, plus the LGTBQ+ representation in its video, literally won a Special Recognition award at the 2003 GLAAD Awards. But it also created an iconic scene in Mean Girls and that, too, is a huge gay achievement. 

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is not make any sense. And gay people really appreciate that. That's that me espresso. 

I actually don't know if anyone BUT gay people have ever heard this song? It's like a dog whistle just for the LGBTQ+ community. 

I mean, hello, she literally lists out the colours of the Pride flag while collaborating  with transgender activists and musical artists, Honey Dijon and Ts Madison. 

Cyndi Lauper released "True Colours" in 1986 after her friend's recent passing from HIV/AIDS and it has remained a cherished anthem in the LGBTQ+ community. Also, it's important to have a few ballads in the playlist if gay people are at the party. 

This song not only skyrocketed RuPaul into stardom, it also introduced the phrase "Sashay, Shantay" into the mainstream culture. And history was made. 

Basically, the first year I ever went to Pride, a drag queen led the audience in a sing-a-long to this song and I swear I had never heard it before and yet…. sing along I did. So, my theory is that gay people just know this song in their DNA. 

I know I’ve been joking around but I’m full serious this song like, singlehandedly birthed modern EDM music. It’s what a good pride party should feel like. Nods.  

Gaga has done a lot of radical stuff in her decades-long reign but nothing was more disruptive than her saying, "No matter gay, straight, or bi, lesbian, transgender life. I'm on the right track, baby. I was born to survive" — all while starting a feud with Madonna at the exact same time. 

Kind of the original "Born This Way." And that's gay history. 

Heed her words this month: F*** out the way when you see me. I’m rolling with the LGBT. 

No one argue with me about this because I DARE you to find something gayer than Sue Sylvester from Glee singing "Vogue" in Mr. Schuester's choir room.

Renaissance is an album rooted in queer history and celebrated ballroom culture on the world stage. This remix, which samples Madonna's "Vogue," is an absolute Pride must-listen. 

The opening piano notes of this song literally makes me feral. Gay bat signal. Might also be greatest song just in general of all time. 

This song has a gay double meaning. Coming out of the closet and also, coming out to DANCE. And that’s what Pride is quite literally all about. 

It's so recent that it doesn't even have a music video yet, but this song still makes it onto the list of most important Pride songs of all TIME because it speaks to a simple truth: If you try to deny who you are.... Good luck, babe! 

"Break Free" is number one for a LOT of reasons but most importantly, because I am an Arianator. And this list is about gay people but, in particular, one Gay Person: me.