Killer intro: How to avoid TMI, but stay true when describing yourself
Be yourself, they say. But where do you draw the line? Here’s how to stay authentic at a job interview, a date and a social gathering
It’s a question so difficult, even Google doesn’t have the answer. Yet, every one of us will be asked it, at work, on a date, at a party: “So, tell me about yourself...”.
On The Office, Dwight responds by describing himself as “hardworking, alpha male, jackhammer, merciless, insatiable” – a fail of a response. In Legally Blonde, young Elle Woods, trying to fit in at Harvard Law School, says she’s a Gemini vegetarian – disastrous, even if it works out well in the end.
Telling the world about yourself is a delicate balancing act. You should come across as authentic but also professional, interesting but never odd. Is it even possible? Let’s take this question to the experts.
Prepare an elevator pitch. “Instead of saying I’m XYZ and I’m a podcaster, start by asking the other person, ‘Do you keep track of all the great podcasts you discover?’” says Uttarakhand-based personality coach Swarleen Kaur. Reframing how you showcase yourself immediately sets you apart. Just keep it to 60 seconds and avoid TMI.
Stick to what you know. But know interesting things in the first place – blabbering on about K-pop, the DC universe and new Nike colourways to HR makes you appear more flighty than focused. Keep your audience in mind when you discuss your interests. Spin K-pop to comment on fandom today; use Batman to talk about film merchandising; make sneakers a touchpoint on how street-style has evolved. Don’t lie. “Faking it from the start only makes for tangled relationships later,” says Kaur.
Play on your personality. If you’re talkative person, don’t dominate the conversation. Ask the interviewer what they’d like to know about you. If you’re shy, focus on details in your responses. “It’s not just the words we use to communicate, but how we use them that matters,” says Tanya Dogra, a Mumbai-based image consultant and corporate trainer. At work and on a date, avoid self-deprecating jokes. They’re easily misconstrued. Avoid tales of trauma. Leave the gym stories back at the gym. Record yourself as you rehearse, watch for nervous tics such as tapping feet, playing with hair, a too-creepy smile.
Get a fit check. “Most people don’t realise that the way they dress and the way they look directly impacts their confidence,” says Dogra. Flamboyance is useless. Let the peacocking come from your words, not your fit. If you plan to talk about sustainability, wear a thrifted shirt to spark off that conversation. If you’re an LGBTQ ally, wear a pin, not the whole rainbow. Your look must seem like it fits in before you can stand out.
Factor in the ’gram. Your online self is as much you as your IRL self. Hiding it is inauthentic and exhausting. We’re all one Google search away from discovering each other’s online personas, anyway. “Develop a consistent voice and visual style across your platforms,” recommends Kaur. Brace for questions about your recent posts and the accounts you follow. Acknowledge what’s true, and find ways to keep the conversation going. This is the you everyone wants to know, anyway.
From HT Brunch, June 22, 2024
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