Here's how you can navigate challenging personalities when resolving conflicts with senior stakeholders.

Senior stakeholder is a person, like everyone else. Treat them with respect, as you would with any other person. Remember that they have their own pressures, goals, and challenges. By approaching them with empathy and understanding, you can build a more productive relationship and find common ground, even in difficult situations.

Understand Their Perspective: Take the time to grasp the senior stakeholder’s viewpoint. This will help you address their concerns more effectively and demonstrate that you value their input Communicate Clearly and Respectfully: Ensure your communication is clear, concise, and respectful. Avoid jargon and be straightforward about the issues and potential solutions.

Try to understand your senior stakeholders from a neutral standpoint by removing your personal emotions from the situation as much as possible. Consider their goals, the pressures they are experiencing, what drives them, how they want to be perceived, and what contributions they value. Once you have this understanding, see how you can empathize with these points.

We all have challenges in managing relationships. It's important to recognise that we don't have to be one another's best friend, nor each other's enemy, but working together, collaboratively is essential. Rapport is always a key to building (and sustaining) good relationships, especially with senior stakeholders. Over the years I've always tried very hard in this area and found a couple of tips to share: 1. Never make it personal. Agree or disagree in a respectful manner - always. 2. Get to know each other - find some common ground and share a story with each other - good icebreaker. 3. Check in - never hesitate to have an R U okay moment, after all we all have challenges in life. 4. Listen - sometimes it's all that's needed.

Senior stakeholders have experience, they've been deceived, even cheated, many times, probably more than when they were positively surprised (it's human nature to remember the problems instead of the successes). Try to understand asap which are their previous bad experiences and build up your content and pitch to demonstrate otherwise.

Build Relationships: Invest time in cultivating strong relationships with senior stakeholders. This can make it easier to navigate conflicts when they arise. Stay Calm and Professional: Keep your emotions in check and remain professional, even if the stakeholder becomes difficult. This helps maintain a constructive atmosphere. Seek Common Ground: Focus on finding common ground and shared goals. This can help align your interests and make it easier to find mutually acceptable solutions.

Ensure your communication is clear, concise, and respectful. Avoid jargon and be straightforward about the issues and potential solutions.

Remember to use examples from other industries, or sports, or your senior stakeholder's favourite hobby, to show the perspective. Some examples I use: Automotive executives: software is like the engine of the card, too many hammering and tweaking will wear-it off. Clients of IT-driven products (about new requirements which deviate completely from agreed architecture): it's like we've planned for trip from Italy to Germany over the Alps and now you're asking to go by the sea, with a catamaran. Your CEO / HR manager, about managers being too operational and less strategic: best and long term winning football coaches come from the pitch themselves; Mourinho is an exception which confirms the rule.

Be Prepared: Come to meetings well-prepared with data, facts, and potential solutions. This shows that you are serious about resolving the conflict and have put thought into your approach. Document Everything: Keep detailed records of all communications and decisions. This can help prevent misunderstandings and provide a reference if disputes arise later

Navigate to the zone where your contributions are valued. Don't waste your energy by "dealing" with "difficult" people. Invest your energy and valuable insights where you are challenged to solve difficulties with ideas to help, renovate, contribute to the society. Toxic people are like weeds. Make them non-existent. All the best. Be at war , with peace in heart.

Empathize and Listen: Show empathy and actively listen to the stakeholder’s concerns. Sometimes, just feeling heard can diffuse a lot of tension.