When giving feedback to a senior leader, focus on facts and the impact of their actions rather than emotions or character traits. Start by clearly stating observable behaviors and the specific outcomes they have produced. Avoid subjective language; instead, use concrete examples to illustrate your points. Frame the feedback around the broader goals and how adjustments can enhance overall effectiveness. Emphasize the practical impact of potential changes, positioning the conversation as a strategic discussion aimed at achieving shared objectives. This fact-based, impact-driven approach minimizes tension and fosters constructive dialogue.

When offering feedback, it should always be about what the person being spoken to needs to hear (what motivates them) and not what the speaker wants to say. When I spoke with my Director about ways to maintain healthy boundaries and avoid splitting amongst the staff, I appealed to my Director's desire to have less on their plate. I proposed a way to keep a unified front while the team members, who are integral to our success, feel supported and the Director will not have to take on additional tasks. By speaking in the affirmative and in a forward-thinking way, the situation was resolved without defensiveness or long conversations, making the staff members feel valued and important.

How you start the process is very important. Don’t make it too big an event and choose a suitable, neutral location. I would start with something like the time working together, would he/she like to get some feedback? Focus on the honesty and transparency of the working relationship.

ALL feedback should be delivered constructively and tension-free. Just because it's going to a "higher-up" doesn't mean it should be viewed or approached any differently.

I think the biggest trap is avoiding giving the feedback until it is so bad you don’t want to work for them anymore. If you haven’t told them your perspective, whose fault is it things got so bad ? I am not a fan of the sandwich technique, instead I would start a conversation and be prepared to hear something that makes you wrong .