Learn six tips on how to empower someone without being condescending in your role as a peer supporter. Empowerment is about helping someone discover and use their own strengths, abilities, and potential.

You can empower others without being condescending by using empathy as a tool. Empathy is by research one of the most effective ways of creating better collaboration, increasing motivation and enabling the other person to feel understood and listened to. I associate condescending behavior with a vibe of "I´m better" or "I know more than you", but with empathy, you show the other person that you want them to be their best, and for that you need to hear from them, what makes them passionate about something. You show, that you trust them and respect them by giving them a voice. This is true empowerment.

Last updated on Jul 10, 2024

How can you empower someone without being condescending?

Empowering someone means helping them discover and use their own strengths, abilities, and potential. It can be a rewarding and meaningful way to support someone who is facing challenges, seeking growth, or pursuing a goal. However, empowerment is not the same as telling someone what to do, how to do it, or why they should do it. That can come across as condescending, patronizing, or disrespectful. How can you empower someone without being condescending? Here are some tips to keep in mind.

1 Be curious

One of the best ways to empower someone is to be genuinely curious about their perspective, experience, and needs. Ask open-ended questions that invite them to share their thoughts, feelings, and insights. Listen actively and attentively, without interrupting, judging, or imposing your own agenda. Show interest and appreciation for their unique contributions and viewpoints. By being curious, you can help them feel valued, respected, and understood.

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Niina Majaniemi

Sr Customer Success Account Manager at Microsoft. MBA. Empathy in business speaker & book author. Accessibility advocate.
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You can empower others without being condescending by using empathy as a tool. Empathy is by research one of the most effective ways of creating better collaboration, increasing motivation and enabling the other person to feel understood and listened to. I associate condescending behavior with a vibe of "I´m better" or "I know more than you", but with empathy, you show the other person that you want them to be their best, and for that you need to hear from them, what makes them passionate about something. You show, that you trust them and respect them by giving them a voice. This is true empowerment.

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Nicole W.

Organizational Coach | Learning and Development Consultant | Organizational Psychology | Instructional Design
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It starts with being genuinely interested in the growth and success of the other person. If you are coming from a genuine place of wanting to empower others, you will communicate that, both verbally and nonverbally in your interactions. If you have concerns about being condescending, take some time to think about your motivations, and refocus your thoughts on how you can contribute (versus maybe what you can gain) from empowering and supporting someone. Everyone starts from somewhere- be open to helping people from where they are and be motivated by the journey of watching them grow.

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2 Be supportive

Another way to empower someone is to be supportive of their choices, goals, and actions. Encourage them to explore their options, identify their resources, and take action steps that align with their values and aspirations. Celebrate their achievements and acknowledge their challenges. Provide feedback and suggestions that are constructive, specific, and relevant. Avoid giving unsolicited advice, criticism, or praise that may undermine their autonomy, confidence, or motivation. By being supportive, you can help them feel capable, inspired, and empowered.

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Alesia Ibrahim

Certified Life Coach (PCC) & Program Coordinator
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In my experience, understanding when there is a need to just sit and listen vs to give advice is important. Meet them where they are at. Sometimes, a person just wants to be validated in their experience, and other times, they want guidance. You can be a supportive figure without feeling the need to be a problem-solver. Also, do not be attached to the advice you give, because again, you must meet them where they are at.

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3 Be collaborative

A third way to empower someone is to be collaborative in your relationship. Treat them as an equal partner, not as a subordinate, a superior, or a dependent. Respect their boundaries, preferences, and decisions. Share your own experiences, ideas, and opinions in a humble and respectful way. Invite their input and feedback on matters that affect them. Seek their consent and agreement before making any changes or commitments. By being collaborative, you can help them feel respected, involved, and valued.

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4 Be respectful

A fourth way to empower someone is to be respectful of their identity, culture, and background. Recognize and appreciate their diversity and uniqueness. Avoid making assumptions, stereotypes, or generalizations that may be inaccurate, insensitive, or offensive. Learn about their history, beliefs, values, and norms. Adapt your communication style and approach to suit their needs and preferences. Apologize and correct yourself if you make a mistake or cause harm. By being respectful, you can help them feel accepted, appreciated, and dignified.

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5 Be ethical

A fifth way to empower someone is to be ethical in your role and responsibilities. Follow the principles and standards of your profession, organization, or community. Maintain confidentiality, privacy, and trust. Avoid conflicts of interest, exploitation, or abuse of power. Be honest, transparent, and accountable for your actions and outcomes. Seek supervision, consultation, or support when needed. By being ethical, you can help them feel safe, secure, and protected.

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6 Be humble

A sixth way to empower someone is to be humble in your attitude and behavior. Recognize and acknowledge your own limitations, biases, and mistakes. Be open to learning from others, especially from those who have different experiences, perspectives, and backgrounds. Seek feedback and suggestions on how to improve your skills, knowledge, and practice. Admit when you don't know something or when you need help. By being humble, you can help them feel respected, valued, and empowered.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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How can you empower someone without being condescending?

1

2

3

4

5

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1 Be curious

2 Be supportive

3 Be collaborative

4 Be respectful

5 Be ethical

6 Be humble

7 Here’s what else to consider

Peer Support

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How can you empower someone without being condescending?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Be curious

2 Be supportive

3 Be collaborative

4 Be respectful

5 Be ethical

6 Be humble

7 Here’s what else to consider

Peer Support

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