You're facing a senior stakeholder resistant to change. How can you build trust with them?

Resistance often stems from fear of the unknown or discomfort with altering the status quo. Approach the conversation with genuine curiosity, asking open-ended questions to uncover the root of their hesitation. For example, ask, “What specific aspects of this change concern you the most?” Acknowledge their feelings by saying, “I understand this change might seem challenging.” Validate their expertise with statements like, “Your experience is invaluable to us.” By demonstrating empathy and a willingness to listen, you show that you view them as a valuable partner in the change process, building the foundation for trust and open communication..

Imagine walking down to your favorite local bakery, like you did for the past 15 years, to get that delicious bagel and a strong cup of coffee, served with a nice comment from behind the counter, only to see it's closed. What's more, there is an "opening soon" note on the door with the logo of a well-known international cafe brand. What is that feeling? Surprise? Confusion? Frustration? Perhaps a determination to never step a foot on the place once opened? Imagine now that a major restructuring is happening at your workplace. How do you feel? Our brains are wired to avoid change as it signals a threat to our survival. Resistance is a natural response we should expect of someone, thus we must prepare in advance on how to deliver the news.

Once you've understood their concerns, work towards aligning your objectives with those of the resistant stakeholder. Discuss shared goals and how the proposed changes can help achieve them. Articulate the vision in a way that resonates with their values and priorities. For example, if their priority is efficiency, highlight how the change will streamline processes. By finding common ground and connecting the change initiative to outcomes they care about, you can shift the conversation from confrontation to collaboration. Emphasize the mutual benefits, saying, "This change can help us achieve our shared goal of increasing productivity." This alignment is key to gaining their support and trust as you move forward together.

In aligning objectives, it is important to first demonstrate clearly that you can see where the other person is coming from. Never assume you fully know their story as that can diminish their experience and create a rift. By using empathy and asking for confirmation, you are setting a stage where the "resisting" party will feel seen and secure enough in their position to start actively listening to yours. Once this step is accomplished you can continue with the alignment of goals, emphasizing the value for the senior stakeholder and discussing what resources could be provided to them as a supporting system during the transition phase.

Respecting the senior stakeholder's experience is vital for building trust. Acknowledge their contributions and the wisdom they bring to the table. When discussing the change, frame it in a way that leverages their knowledge and experience. For example, ask for their input on how to best implement the change or what potential pitfalls to avoid, saying, “Given your experience, what are some key considerations we should keep in mind?” This approach not only validates their role in the organization but also encourages them to become an active participant in the change process. By respecting their experience, you foster a sense of partnership and collaboration, essential for gaining their support.

A senior stakeholder is senior for a reason. There is a lot of knowledge under their belt and certainly their experience can be of value to you. Ask for their opinion and advice on specific cases. For example, if the change at hand is due to the introduction of a new digital tool in the department, ask what do they think are the benefits and risks of the implementation from their point of view. This is a win-win as you will gain more perspective in order to achieve your end-goal and they will feel included, valued and trusted.

Demonstrate your commitment to both the change initiative and to them as an individual. Show that you are invested in the long-term success of the change and that you are there to support them through the transition. Offer resources, training, or assistance they may need to adapt to the new way of doing things. For instance, say, “We have a comprehensive training program in place to help everyone adjust smoothly.” Your consistent support and dedication, evidenced by regular check-ins and personalized assistance, can help ease their resistance and build a trusting relationship. This commitment reassures them that you are a reliable partner in navigating the change together.