How can you help peers find meaning and purpose in their lives?

Throughout my career, I've often reflected on this myself and ask my mentors similar questions. When I have the opportunity to coach others, I encourage them to reflect on: 1. what makes them feel most alive 2. what are the things they do that make them feel like they are in their element 3. what brings them a sense of deep contribution Helping them go through self reflection to find ways to align ways to apply answers to the above questions into their daily life, both in their personal and professional life is key. In situations where they struggle to identify those answers, encouraging them to ask 3 people they are close to who can offer perspective from the outside to. validate their gifts!

Helping peers find meaning and purpose requires empathy and vulnerability. Listen without judgment as they share core values and aspirations. Ask thoughtful questions to prompt self-reflection on what matters most to them. Expose them to diverse philosophies and perspectives that could spark profound realizations. Encourage growth through continual learning, creativity and striving for mastery. Discuss ways to contribute to society and make a positive impact through service. By fostering sincere introspection, you allow their authentic sense of purpose to emerge organically.

Open questions are the bedrock of great coaching. But questions are also a way to direct our own minds. When you're stressed or unsure or completely lost as to what your purpose is, what question would help you to get back on track? For example: "What worked well for me before?" When do I feel most in flow?" or "What would be a bold next step?" are great questions that help you to see the path ahead. Despite not wanting to do myself out of a job, I think that learning to coach ourselves is very powerful!

How someone helps others find meaning and purpose in life is a deeply personal answer. First, is defining the values they hold and the impact that has on their journey to find meaning. Related to my field of law enforcement it can feel disheartening; there is no elimination of crime and suffering at the hands of criminals. Imagine a world where all law enforcement decided to throw their sucker in the dirt and go home. What would the world look like? Can you change your mindset and consider what you do does matter in the world if you come at it with an altered mindset, passion and genuine selflessness? With passion, selflessness, and focus on being the best you can be at your craft, then satisfaction, meaning, and purpose will follow.

Where possible, I like to ask open ended questions on strengths the person may not recognise as a strength. I also like to go 7 deep, ie. ask what will that give you/how will that change things etc after each answer for 7 times as they will often think they've reached the answer yet with perseverance, they'll uncover what's truly important to them

I remember vividly the first time I watched Simon Sinek Ted Talk about the Golden Circle. My then manager organized a workshop around it and it completely changed my perspective of many things. Through the years I have shown it to colleagues in my teams and friends. It’s an extremely powerful message that can change our approach to work and life. I absolutely recommend it, watch it, read the book “Start with Why” and discover your inner motivations. Then allow that to drive your actions and decisions.

Sharing personal narratives of uncovering meaning and purpose can profoundly influence our peers' journeys. By narrating tales of surmounting challenges, gaining wisdom from failures, and finding motivation from external sources, we offer significant insights into the voyage of self-discovery. Additionally, revealing the progression of our own sense of purpose over time showcases the fluidity of this expedition and underscores its impact on our choices and behaviors. Through the art of storytelling, we establish a bond with our peers, furnishing them with relatable anecdotes, actionable takeaways, and encouragement to initiate their personal quests for self-awareness and development.

The power and palpability of our personal narrative often inspires others to move forward with renewed fortitude. We all contend with challenges, and we find ways to overcome the adversity and enact change. Sometimes all it takes is a reminder from a colleague that “If I can do it, you can do it.” Everyone has a story, and sharing our unique experience adds connection and authenticity to our collective reality.

It really about listening to them carefully in conversation and following up with questions on the nuances you hear them mention. “Tell me more about that?” Is a great way to understand what drives people. What drives people are their values. Their values can then align with actions that give them purpose. But there are no quick paths to this. Patience and self grace is the key.

I stumbled across my life purpose quite young, but I didn't use a methodology like the one I share with my clients. Though meaning and purpose are some of the scarcest resources in our society, what I have found is that a combination of being of service to others, along with gratitude for small things tends to help a lot!

Two ways to help a friend explore different sources of meaning and purpose: 1. Ask them to write down 3 of their most important personal values (core beliefs that drive their behavior and decision-making) and then write down how many ways they are actively engaging those values. If it's hard to see the connection between values and actions, it may be time to pursue some new activities. 2. Ask them to reflect on 3 people in their life whose advice or guidance had a critically important influence on them (good or bad). Then ask them to consider how they might take that influence and pay it forward to help ease the path ahead for someone else.

I would ask a peer or friend to explain a time when they had deep meaning in their life and what was the source of it. I would also ask what they think their purpose is in showing up to work or their business every day. Is there a sense of growth, contribution, or connection they seek and are interested in providing to others? The purpose and meaning questions are often related and can reinforce things for people.

1. Be curious-ask those why questions. 2. Encourage the pursuit of passion and joy. 3. Help to connect their purpose to the greater good- How can their passion and talent benefit humanity? 4.LEAD BY EXAMPLE-give folks permission and freedom to explore and hone their gifts and pursue their dreams.

The dialog around purpose seems to be greater now than I can ever remember. And most of it is complicated and confusing when it should be simple. The first insight I offer my clients is that you don’t “find” your purpose, you build it, stone upon stone. Start with a candid look at your real strengths. That’s the first stone. What are the things you’re gifted with a talent or ability to do? Then add your values - the spiritual code by which you live and work. That’s the next stone. What values define the things you will, or won’t, do? Now think about who you are most drawn to help - what people or causes pull you in? One more stone - what impact do you want to create? How do you want to be remembered? This is how purpose is built.

In my experience it is important to create a safe space to explore. This means investing in getting to know a person and their value system. Once you understand the person, you look for ways to provide value. I have had peers share their interests and invite me into the worlds they are in to discover. I tend to ask questions that prompt reflection, “Have you ever thought about…?” Leading discovery helps prompt the process of finding and pursuing purpose.

If you’ve tried to achieve the same goal, using the same strategy, multiple times, but haven’t yet succeeded, you’re not in a cycle. 𝗬𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝗰𝗶𝗿𝗰𝗹𝗲. And it’s not likely to change. But if you use each attempt to change your approach you’re in a cycle that’s taking you closer to what you want. So, when you fail to reach a goal, try answering these questions before you begin again. ↪︎︎ What did I learn? ↪︎︎ How will I adapt my approach? ↪︎︎ What result will my changes bring? ↪︎︎ Is it enough to achieve the goal? Every attempt brings growth. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗮 𝗰𝗶𝗿𝗰𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮 𝗰𝘆𝗰𝗹𝗲 𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗽𝘀. 𝗜𝘁’𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂.

Once they've demonstrated a commitment and clear path, look for opportunities to connect them to people or projects that will help them advance. This can include everything from sharing news articles about their areas of interest, any information about new roles, information events or professional associations or networking events that will allow them to form more connections and gather more information and direct contacts.

After a client has gone through my Values, Life-Purpose, and Vision clarification exercise then they create a plan. In my coaching, my client's accountability is to themselves. I can ask them questions, but in the end I cannot lift weights for them to get strong. After clarity there is getting into action, and the most challenging thing at that stage is fear. Fear can hide behind what seems like resistance or aversion. But it is in the action-taking that people learn to work with and overcome their fears.

This for me is important when it comes to searching for Meaning: Meaning is a journey rather than an endpoint. We often get stuck searching for "our purpose" when our journey of learning and contributing is our real life purpose. Setting goals that are aligned with your journey give you a sense of purpose and clarity, and help you to look back and see how far you've come. Another question that often comes up is "How do I choose which path?" - this is a challenge when there's so much information out there! I think this comes back to learning to spot your cues as to when you're out of alignment. And learning to trust yourself. What do you feel when you're truly aligned? How can you get back to that?

It is important to understand the difference between process goals and end-point goals. Process goals focus on the journey, aiding habit formation and long-term growth. End-point goals target specific achievements, creating short-term motivation and satisfaction that can quickly fade. While both have their place, prioritizing process goals cultivates a mindset of continuous improvement, and is more likely to create feelings of purpose and meaning.

By not imposing a set of beliefs onto an individual, we can establish a relationship that focuses on the unique strengths of our peer that have been developed through their own lived experiences and cultural norms. Taking an "if you like it, I love it" approach really puts the peer we are working with in the driver's seat and allows them to be the master of their lives and identify ways they can be at their best and also support their community with the greatest impact.

It's important to be seen as someone trustworthy and as someone who could be a safe space. Once that's been established: 1. Help the other person discover their why: What gets them out of bed even on tough days? What would they want to do even if they weren't paid to do it? 2. See how what they're doing connects to the bigger picture: Whatever job or task they have, how does it contribute to the company? How does it add value to others? 3. Go back to the tip on helping colleagues create goals and make sure they're SMART: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-bound.

What I have found in the research is that the word find is often associated with an external focus, while we believe that meaning and purpose can be brought with you which implies an inside out approach. Based on original job crafting research in 2001 (Amy Wrzesniewski and Jane E. Dutton) meaning and purpose can start from within in what we call 3 Rhythms. The Perspective Rhythm (How we choose to see things), The Task Rhythm (What we choose to do) and the Relationship Rhythm (Who we choose to engage). We have the power to bring meaning with us even in the most challenging of situations (if I can do it in the TSA line, everyone can do it 😎).

The peer role will need to be strongly advocated for to prevent cooptation. Far too frequently, many of us have seen peers used in roles that do not take advantage of their capabilities and potential impact on those they work with. It is a frequent occurrence that peers are viewed as more of a tech position due to low pay and the absence of the traditional titles that are "respected" within the field. Peers need to be compensated appropriately, be involved in program design, and not have their own ethics and morals compromised to meet the needs of the employer.

To find meaning and purpose (in my work), it always helps to remember my "why" for being in the business in the first place. For me, it all goes back to a temporary job at had a university - one of my first real jobs out of college and the military, working with adult learners. I'll never forget one particular student who was struggling to put her dissertation package together for a number of reasons. What stuck out for me was her unwavering commitment to herself and her goal. That grit, that determination - that, by the way, wasn't just about her, but was also about the family cheering her on and praying for her success - that's why I do what I do. If you remember why you started, you'll always find your way back. :)

Our purpose is that we have breath and our passion can be found in breathing! Through breath we are able to live - and life is a gift