PJ Grana’s Post

View profile for PJ Grana, graphic

Senior Manager within Human Resources at Capital One

Today I wrapped up the last of five sessions with a group of professional hires that was designed to help them incorporate coaching techniques into their day to day relationships. I sent them off with a summary of some of the key items I hope they remember and I thought it might be fun to share - Here you go! Key Takeaways from our Sessions -Coaching works best for Good to Great, not terrible to Good, -When starting a conversation you can lean on this acronym to establish your base - TOMS Topic Outcome Meaning Success -What is your first question after you ask what you want to be coached on today? Mine - Tell me what makes this important to you? -Great questions are what we seek, avoid the obvious -Build context if you need it, tell me more about that, how did that make you feel, what about that surprised you? -Follow the client (to some degree, you need to stay on topic to some extent) and withhold judgment and you cannot project your own experience or get distracted -Listen, really listen, look for body language, tone, facial expressions, where are they looking, shoulders slumping, are they getting emotional - And comment on what you are seeing from a place of empathy. You know you are a good listener when someone tells you about an upcoming vacation to somewhere you have already been and you don't feel the need to tell them about your past trip, just ask them what they are excited for in their upcoming one! -Don't fill space - Let the person answer the question, silence is okay, we are just so not used to it -True back to what the topic for today is, challenge the person you are speaking with to come with a topic in mind, if they give the lame I have nothing to talk about excuse you can use my next line - So you have reached the pinnacle of everything you wish to achieve both personally and professionally? -Open ended questions, How and What are the best options, reframe your Why questions into these types of language choices -If someone asks themselves a question out loud, challenge them to answer it! (Thanks Sarah Happel for this tip) -Make them commit to something, smaller might be better, large leaps are often points of failure and can be discouraging, the culmination of the small steps is the large leap -Land the discussion or session, what are the things you are committing to doing before we meet next time? -Don’t disguise your opinions as questions (Thanks James Clawson for this tip) -All assessments items are great or terrible - They can be good for self reflection, what stands out about this to you?  I rarely deep dive into my own take aways, I want to know what the person receiving the feedback finds interesting, surprising, empowering -Develop a set of go to questions 5 to 10 that you know by heart What coaching is not Consulting Phone a Friend

Sarah Happel

President & Founder, Spectrum Leadership Solutions

6mo

What a great program, PJ. Thanks for sharing your take on integrating coaching into daily conversations. I really like your distinction, “Great questions are what week seek. Avoid the obvious.” And if we are truly listening and being curious, a powerful question will naturally pop into our heads. Keep up the great work.

Hope Scott, CPTD®, ACC

Learning & Development Director at Cinemark

6mo

These are great tips! I love your "So you have reached the pinnacle of everything you wish to achieve both personally and professionally?" question. Hope you're well.

Emilia Spadola

Passionate People Leader | Learning & Development Enthusiast | People and Culture Fanatic

6mo

Thanks for sharing these reminders and tips! You reinforce an important responsibility we hold as coaches, we are in service to the people we here to support.

See more comments

To view or add a comment, sign in

Explore topics