The ADHD Clinic’s Post

Why Self-Preservation Is Key to Protecting Your Peace Every Day In our fast-paced lives, finding moments of peace can be a challenge. Practicing self-preservation—our instinct to protect ourselves—can be key to safeguarding your mental and emotional well-being. Here are some insightful takeaways: ➡️ Set Boundaries: Protect your time and energy by learning to say no and creating personal limits, whether at work or in relationships. ➡️ Pause Before Reacting: A moment of reflection before responding in stressful situations can make all the difference, allowing for clearer, more measured actions. ➡️ Self-Care Isn't Selfish: Prioritize your well-being by practicing self-care, taking breaks, and nurturing self-compassion. ➡️ Recognize Your Needs: Acknowledge your emotional responses and listen to your body’s signals to prevent burnout and maintain a healthy balance. By cultivating these habits, you can preserve your peace and foster personal growth. How do you protect your peace each day? 👉 https://lnkd.in/gEhkDRGq #SelfPreservation #MentalHealth #WellBeing #WorkLifeBalance #PersonalGrowth

It’s #wellnesswednesday today and I’ve got several things floating around in my massive head. I mean, seriously, my mom had to cut the back of my cap and sew in additional fabric for my high school graduation. Many of the things I’m thinking about aren’t really associated with mental health, so I’m fighting the urge to go a different direction. I know this is my post, so I can write about whatever I want, but I don’t want to take the spotlight off of mental health. I get a message about once a month from someone who tells me my post helped them. I’m not ever expecting to go viral, or have thousands of followers, or hundreds of thousands of views. My hope is that one follower with one view sees something I’ve written and it helps them in some way. Teresa and I have been on vacation for a week or so and as we were in a bus driving to some city, I was observing traffic as we were driving down the road on the left. I’m not a big “there’s a lesson in everything” kind of guy. However, as we were driving I found myself thinking about how frequently we use right and wrong language to describe things that are different than we’ve become accustomed to. The Brits drive on the “wrong” side of the road. Why don’t the European countries use the “right” measurements. Etc… When I think like that, it creates instant conflict. “They’re” worshipping the wrong God. “They” want to go the wrong way. “The other side” wants to take away our freedom. I wonder how much easier it would be if we acknowledged that “they” are the way they are largely because of where they were born and how they were raised. I’m not suggesting we should focus on engaging calmly and respectfully. I think in many cases, we’re way beyond that. If you want to strip away women’s bodily autonomy or the rights of LGBTQIA+ people, I’m not going to “calmly engage in discussion”. What I am suggesting is that for my mental health, I’m going to choose to engage in personal relationships with people I can respect and cut out those who just don’t want the same things as me. I guess this got a little political. Oh well, it’s what I’m thinking about today.

Banging my head against a Brick Wall.. When you mask at a high level, no matter how many times you tell people your struggle, if they don’t understand your condition they have issues believing it. The impact of this reflects in their daily actions and only adds to the struggles. I do not have a problem explaining my condition to people and talk openly about it - for me communication is key. The issues I have is societal views and the lack of understanding and ignorance around the neurodivergent condition. So many services I deal with daily create constant issues and impact my mental health in a negative manner even after continuous explanations, speaking to managers and false promises of change! The sad thing is, I only ask for clear communication - in conversation, appointments/meeting times, sticking to plans. This seems very simple and I believe it is, which is why it is so triggering that all the effort I put in (often in writing) is it completely ignored to be followed by ‘I am/we are sorry’ words that I am all to accustomed to. This has been my experience with the NHS, the mental health teams, doctors, psychiatrists, education services and many more, I question all the time: is it me? Have I done something wrong? Do people not believe what I tell them? Do they not care? Do they do it on purpose? If I ‘looked’ disabled would I be treated differently? Not only is this triggering but it’s mentally draining to have to deal with it day in day out. If I have these issues and I can explain to people in full what helps me (which are small reasonable adjustments and to be honest I feel should be common practice in communication) how do services deal with children who can’t express or explain their condition? I feel there is still so far to go and if the changes aren’t made from the top then we will never make advances as a society. As individuals, please be aware of your actions. I personally treat people how I like to be treated. Something that seems so little and insignificant to you may have enormous impact on someone else’s day/week. Is your company inclusive? Do you do enough? These are the questions every single company, service, business and individual should be asking. #neurodivergent #diversity #awareness #understanding #acceptance #livedexperience #think #education #restructure #dobetter #inclusive #asd #autism #autistic #adhd #audhd #cptsd #mentalhealth

Despite looking like I’m shrouded in darkness earlier, this was my happier than earlier face (I’d had a pretty unfocused morning!!) upon realising the days are getting longer! I read somewhere that it won’t be dark before 4:30pm until some time in November. This pleases me somewhat. Anyways, I’d returned from my counselling session where I had quite the outpouring of unfairness. Is that even a word? I guess it’s more the feeling of injustice perhaps! There’s been stuff professionally and personally that have felt like a complete and utter injustice. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I am honest. Some scenarios I can not say or do anything about them, and have to let them play out. This is not my strength. Especially when it FEELS so unfair. So I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently and it came up today. So we worked on how to not get caught up and overwhelmed by these feelings and something fed back to me was that although some of these things may feel like there isn’t a choice, I am still actively making several choices that can be the positive focus: for example, by not retaliating I’m showing kindness. Making that choice not to engage which could impact other people. It also demonstrates that I’m happy with my values; and that those values remain intact whilst I am not engaging. This really landed with me because that’s the price of having values. Without them I guess there would not be the feeling of injustice?! I always strive to be a decent person and when other people are not, that can feel a little hurtful. It is not helped by the #ADHD which amplifies all the feelings (these are often offset when you consider how good the good stuff feels)! knowing there’s a reason your brain works like it does is helpful. Just need to work through where to put those feelings when they aren’t positive. #SelfWork #MentalHealth #Adapting #MoodyMondayMusings

Emptiness in a World of Connection In the corporate world that I work in, we often thrive on connection. But as someone with ADHD and undiagnosed Autism for much of my life, I used to feel a strange disconnect when people talked about love, connection or even gave hugs. I couldn’t feel what they were expressing. Growing up in a family that didn’t say “I love you” or show affection, I didn’t learn how to connect emotionally. As a child, I craved affection but didn’t receive it. So when others talked about connection and love, I felt left out, like I couldn’t relate. It was all foreign to me. About three years ago, I made a conscious effort to build meaningful connections by developing my social skills. This was a transformative experience, allowing me to better understand myself and leading to the realization that I have ADHD and Autism. It also opened the door to healthier, more fulfilling relationships—with my coworkers, friends, and family. This journey has given me unique insights, including the difference between my disabilities and the role social anxiety plays in my life. I’ve slowly been able to fill the void of emptiness I’d carried for years. While I still have a lot to learn about my emotions, I finally feel like I’m on the right path. We talk a lot about loneliness, but I think emptiness is something we don’t talk about enough—the feeling of nothingness, even in the most intense situations, like when you’re being screamed at or when emotions run high. It’s hard to navigate and even harder to express. If this resonates with you, I want you to know that I see you, I hear you. While our experiences may not be exactly the same, it can help to connect with someone who understands. If you’re feeling disconnected, overwhelmed, or just need someone to talk to, I’m here to listen and help. #MentalHealth #ADHD #Autism #Neurodiversity #SocialAnxiety #EmotionalWellbeing #CorporateConnection #WorkplaceMentalHealth #EmpathyInLeadership

Resilience is more than just bouncing back—it's about thriving despite adversity. For LGBTQIA+ people, resilience is a powerful tool to combat the unique challenges we face, from minority stress to internalized negative messages. It's the ability to embrace our true selves and navigate tough times with strength and grace. Building resilience helps us: 🪴 Challenge and transform negative beliefs about our identities 💜 Cultivate self-acceptance and self-love ☀️ Strengthen our mental and emotional well-being 🌈 Foster connections within our community for mutual support 🐸 Adapt to changes and overcome obstacles with confidence Resilience isn't just an innate trait—it's a set of skills we can develop and enhance. Through community connection, dedicated self-care, and seeking additional mental health support when needed, we can bolster our resilience and set ourselves up for a brighter, more empowered future. #therapy #mentalhealth #queeringtherapy #lbgtq #bayarea #lgbtqmarin #marin #lgbtmentalhealth #queertherapist #lgbtqtherapy #protecttransyouth #queer #queerspam #resilience #mindfulness #queerjoy #pridemonth

🔍 Whose Voice Are You Listening To? 🔍 In the journey of personal and professional growth, it’s crucial to reflect on the influences shaping our decisions and values. ✨ Whose voice are you letting dictate your values? Are they uplifting voices that encourage you to strive for your best, or are they voices that instill doubt and fear? 💭 Whose voice is backing you into a corner, threatening your well-being? It’s time to identify the sources of negativity that may be holding you back from your true potential. 💪 Whose voice is making you think you aren’t strong enough, brave enough, or capable enough to make decisions about your own life? Remember, your journey is yours alone; you are the author of your story. 🚫 Whose voice is convincing you that there’s only one way? The world is full of diverse perspectives and paths—don’t let a single narrative limit your options. As we navigate our careers and lives, let’s consciously choose which voices we listen to. Surround yourself with those that inspire growth, resilience, and authenticity. What voices are you choosing to amplify? Share your thoughts below! 👇 #SelfReflection #PersonalGrowth #Empowerment #MindsetMatters #YourVoiceMatters #ADHD #AUDHD #SocialJustice #Inclusion #Equity #autism #diversity #neurodivergent #MentalHealth #Accommodation #disability #ADHDAwarenessMonth #trauma #TraumaInformed #EQ #EmotionalIntelligence #CPTSD #ChronicPain #depression #anxiety #DEI #DisabilityInclusion

In honor of #WorldMentalHealthDay, I just want to remind us all to be mindful to acknowledge the barriers individuals on the spectrum often face with socialization and majority of their relationships. This can lead to isolation and mental health issues that can be avoided. Because our behaviors, patterns, and social capabilities look and feel different, doing your homework on autism is essential to sustaining the relationship with the individual on the spectrum. Transparent example: My favorite way to stim is to pace and spin on my right heel, or repeat processes I find interesting to people with key factors in mind. Sadly, in most settings throughout my life, it created a wall that limited my ability to maintain social interaction and friendships because if I wasn’t talking about a process, I struggled with caring about other conversations. I would try my best to revert the conversation back to talking about the process because I wasn’t finished yet. That was not fair to the individuals that honestly wanted to enjoy me but also wanted to enjoy other conversations with less weight to them.  “There’s a proper time and place," I would try to tell myself before entering a room. While there, when I felt the urge coming, I found a reason to leave. I would rather leave early and miss the fun than ruin the mood trying to get down to a solution no one truly needed in that moment. I’ll go from the dance floor to trying to solve a supply chain issue in three seconds. Thankfully, once I discussed this with my family, colleagues, and friends, my village was able to be honest with me about how it affected them. They didn’t know how to say it because they knew I was a good person with a little extra passion about supply chains and didn’t want to hurt my feelings. I’ve done a lot of work to manage it. We’ve done a lot to manage it while still finding room for me to feel comfortable, accepted and AWARE. Open conversations with others about various differences in their engagements with me vs. traditional experiences with others helped me analyze what was learned behavior, personality based behavior, chosen behavior, environment behavior, culture behavior, and neurological-based behavior. It was tough, but it was good for my mental health and for those that care about me.  Because others are willing to have transparent communication, therapy, and new understandings, my mental health is better, and my relationships with everyone are better. From family to colleagues, we’re all better for understanding autism and understanding how to foster empathy on both sides. Happy World Mental Health Day! Your National Ambassador of Autism in The Workplace, Prince Michael

Do you change how you present yourself in certain formal situations? Imagine doing this for every situation, acting in ways that don’t come naturally to you, to meet social expectations and blend into society. We call this process ‘masking’. Masking is the process of crafting a persona to camouflage our autistic traits, to fit in. Although there may be elements of masking that seem familiar to everyone, such as changing how you present yourself in certain formal situations, autistic people have emphasised that masking is different to this. Masking is described as making efforts to manually act in ways that come naturally to non-autistic people, to meet social expectations and blend into society through exhausting effort that can lead to autistic burnout and other mental health issues. With a keen eye for detail, autistic people diligently study others’ behaviours, mirroring social cues and gestures to fit in seamlessly. It is done consciously or unconsciously. Behind the facade of confidence lies a constant internal struggle to interpret nonverbal cues and navigate the intricate dynamics of social situations and the workplace. Masking is like wearing an invisible cloak to fit into a world that often feels too loud, too bright, too overwhelming. For many autistic people, it is a daily act of camouflage. But behind the façade lies a complex mix of exhaustion, anxiety, and a longing to be understood. Imagine constantly deciphering social cues, mimicking neurotypical behaviour, all the while battling sensory overload. Despite the exhaustion of constantly monitoring and adjusting our actions, our dedication to blending in, in the workplace especially, is driven by a desire to excel professionally while concealing our true self, fearing potential stigma. This is why I am making these posts this week, to raise awareness that we are different but not less than. It is important that society becomes more accepting of autistic ways of being so that the pressure to mask is reduced. #Masking #Autism #AutismAwarenessWeek #ActuallyAutistic #Neurodiversity #Disability #MentalHealth

I want to give a little insight on people who are "different". A specific example is a 40 year old, male. He holds a 4.0 MBA in business, elected to be on the board of directors at his alma mater, and attained his B.A. in meteorology. He has been let go—again. In his personal life with friends, he's likable, upbeat, and has a fun sense of humor. He has many hobbies such as photography and storm chasing. He's a person that you might not know is autistic. That makes it quite difficult because he's very hireable. The caveat for him is the added exaustion of trying to fit into a nuerotypical world. He states at the interview his divergence and they encourage authenticity by advocating support for autism. "Why, we even promote work participation to join our yearly autism awareness marathon." Yet, during hire probation, an autistic person may not pick up on little nuances and sarcasms, not pick up on social queues. With job and financial insecurities, there's added stress dealing with anxiety. Then with no indications, just before a 90-day review, they go around him and tell his temp agency they've decided temp to perm will be temp to termed. His temp agency representative and friends are shocked. Sadly, he is not. No one will give answers to help with his communication skills to draw from and try to improve. Think how frustrating it is to not be your authentic self, yet feel like a failure for not fitting in and not knowing why. From stress of financial jeopardy to questioning "Will I get the job" to "They're starting to tease me, how should I take that?" "Am I not filtering?" Yet coworkers are faltering with their own faux pas i.e., "I noticed you never use our bathroom?" "I've noticed you talk to yourself when your analyzing data". "Is that eczema, usually that's stress induced". Then there's the leadership's inadequacies with communication to discuss it. —A prognosis for needing a mental wellness day, now puts a leadership and HR on alert for "mental issues". And this self-narrative is all based on assumptions of having no clue why you got fired. Society encourages that the measure of: your worth is not outside of your own skin. Bad businesses counter with, the measure of: our idea of your worth is what pays your bills, and we fall prey to this toxicity. It's not a personal failure. It's a system's failure. The majority of the business world can be very cold and those that don't recognize this error and the paradigm shift it's created will become the dinosaurs of the future. Change is inevitable and adjusting, always begins from within. Some will seek this practice of self-love, autonomously, some may have past traumas and seek therapists, some will choose physical or spiritual practices, and some will connect with coaches to help strengthen their true inner core. Journey by staying authentic, whoever we are, and find the right team. Evolving to become our best is priceless. ❤🧭🌎 #inwardgrowth #outwardgrowth