The RN Resume’s Post

Are you unintentionally sabotaging yourself? Do you find it hard to go on vacation and leave others to cover your patients. I invite you to take a tough look at any habits or beliefs that may be reinforcing this dynamic. Here is my story When I was a young oncologist fresh out of fellowship, I believed that providing excellent care meant being the sole provider for my patients - their one and only. I made it clear they would always see me, no matter what. I didn't take much time off in those days. But we did take the kids to Disney World one year. While there, one of my patients became critically ill and ultimately died. Because of how I had set things up, the hospital team was calling me constantly. I was desperately trying to manage this patient's care from an amusement park - a losing battle that only distracted me from my family's vacation. I even recall weighing whether to cut our trip short and fly home, which seems ludicrous given the expense and my kids' excitement about Disney. But that's how invested I had become in this dysfunctional dynamic where I believed quality care could only come from me personally. If I wasn't available, it inherently meant substandard care in my mind. Looking back, that mentality was not only detrimental to my own wellbeing but also did a disservice to patients. By setting myself up as the sole provider of proper care, I was signaling that other doctors on my team were unqualified - that patients shouldn't fully trust them because they didn't manage things exactly like me. So anytime I was unavailable, whether on vacation or simply getting sick myself, patients felt they were receiving inferior care. The truth is, no individual, no matter their efforts or sacrifices, can be available 24/7/365. We are human with our own needs and personal lives. Emergencies, illnesses, and obligations will inevitably take us away at times. By creating a cult of myself as the only good doctor, I disrespected my colleagues' abilities and led patients to feel abandoned whenever I was physically or mentally unable to provide coverage. Now, I believe the best approach is a well-designed care team and system. My personal excellence matters, but our practice needs robust systems in place to ensure patients always feel supported and receive appropriate care access, regardless of individual availability.

This is a reminder that the people in your life need you, so take the time to look after yourself. The man in the photo is my father. Over a week ago he collapsed from an infection that went septic (i.e.: it entered his bloodstream). He'll be 93-years-old in a few months, and he wasn't in the best of health to begin with, so the situation was bad. This is the first time in eight days that he's been able to sit up and eat. The other day, while driving back from the hospital, I switched on the radio and heard a woman talking about how important it is for all of us to care for ourselves... not just for the sake of ourselves, but also for the people who rely on us. Her advice struck a chord. Here are a few more reminders and lessons from the past 9 days: The first week of a difficult situation is usually the toughest. But if you can make personal adjustments with daily routines and responsibilities to feel like you're gaining some control, you'll better respond to whatever curveballs life throws your way. Some examples: - Prioritize work tasks, and projects (e.g.: I have two writing projects in the works, but will now focus on the one that involves others; the book-update project can wait).  - Go to bed early and wake up early.  - Don't wait until you're hungry to begin making breakfast, lunch or dinner; make healthy meals in advance (or as much of a healthy meal as you can before returning to it later).   - Don't abandon exercise routines; just reduce their duration.  - Stop watching television (you won't miss much).  - Let friends and colleagues know what's going on, they may offer assistance. Just as important: Be polite and kind to medical professionals; most of them are overworked, undervalued and underpaid.  Listen to what they say. Follow their directions. Stay out of their way.  And, like most of us, they like being told that they're appreciated, so tell them! Feel welcome to share your words of wisdom or personal advice to whoever is looking at this thread. That's what the comment section is for! 

Gut punched Sometimes life just comes along and punches you in the gut. No other way to describe it. Then it knocks you off your feet. And then you feel like the rug just got pulled out from under you. You’re a little disoriented and off-kilter. The things that you normally do without thinking now require an effort that you aren’t used to making. When multiple things smack you in the face simultaneously, or over a short period of time, I encourage you to take it easy, to ask less of yourself than you normally would, to be kinder to yourself than you normally are. Sometimes I have clients who are struggling with this very feeling. When everything is coming at them too fast, I tell them to think of themselves as if they were a triage nurse in an Emergency Room. If it’s not bleeding out (or a heart attack or an anaphylactic reaction), it can wait. Think of how much less you would feel the need to do in your day if you were thinking as that triage nurse does. Just do the minimum, the most important things that you must do. Nothing else. You may be wondering: Wouldn’t I just be piling things on to tomorrow’s To-Do list, and making it worse for myself later? The easy answer: no, not really. Because later you will be back on your feet (with the rug underneath you, just where it should be), and you will be better able to handle all those issues. When I was younger, I had the epiphany that most days weren’t going to be great days -- or awful days. Most days were going to be just fine. If you are having one of those “just fine” days, try to be grateful for it. Because a gut punch is coming soon enough. (It happens to all of us at some point.) Learn to recognize those “same old, same old” days, and appreciate it when there’s no emergency. And use that time to figure out the resources you will need to call on when there is an emergency. And then let’s treat ourselves gently and kindly when real emergencies burst through the door. If I can help you figure out your priorities when life gives you a smack, give me a call at 301-523-8882 or email me at FermataConsult@gmail.com.

Are You Dealing With Lack Of Motivation And Stress? - - As many of us know, Nursing is one of the most rewarding, yet demanding careers. But let’s be real there are days when the stress feels overwhelming and the motivation just isn't there. If you’re in the same boat, know that you’re not alone. Let me share with you how I handle stress when I’m feeling less motivated; 1️⃣ I Acknowledge My Feelings It’s okay to admit when you’re struggling. Stress and burnout are real, and ignoring them won’t make them go away. Take time to check in with yourself and recognize when you need a break. 2️⃣ I Reach Out to My Support System Lean on your fellow nurses, friends, and family. Talking it out with someone who understands your challenges can make a world of difference. We’re all in this together, and having someone to share your thoughts with can reduce that heavy burden. 3️⃣ I Break Down My Tasks Into Smaller Steps Feeling overwhelmed? Break down your responsibilities into manageable steps. Tackling one thing at a time helps you stay focused and reduces that feeling of being swamped. 4️⃣ I find ways to reconnect with my Purpose Why did you choose nursing? Sometimes, revisiting your passion for patient care and remembering the lives you’re impacting can reignite your motivation. Every small action makes a difference! 5️⃣ I understand that Self-Care Isn’t Selfish Whether it’s taking a walk, meditating, reading, or simply getting a good night’s sleep self-care is key. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so make sure you’re taking care of YOU, too. Remember, nursing is a marathon, not a sprint and It’s normal to have ups and downs. Try as much as possible to make the best out of every experience. Also remember, tough times don’t last but tough people do. Have a Blessed Week ahead, stay strong, I’m rooting for you. Follow me to see more of my updates. #NurseLife #StressManagement #MentalHealthMatters #NurseMotivation #SelfCareInNursing

The Insaneness of How People Act: Part One Analogy: You head to the doctor and visit them and the nurse practitioner with an open wound. It's clearly painful, and infected, and they do a ton of tests, and tell you what you need to heal yourself. And then they don't heal you. You know they can, you know what you need but you can't get what you need from them. Your wound continues to fester, and at some point you recover, but you are left with the impression of how you felt when you were helpless or needing support, and instead you just got no response or action from them. The Doctor+Nurse see so many people, they don't even think about this, but their lack of action has scarred you for life (literally) because they opted in to help you but they didn't help you reach a positive conclusion, even if it was that they couldn't help you further. Does this make any sense? It doesn't, but this is what happens every day when people opt-in to meet/read/learn what you are doing and then when you followup to see what they thought, ask them to help, or even ask them to invest etc they just ghost you and think nothing of it. ______ For me this wound festers every day and I keep a list of everyone who took my time, offered to do something, and didn't do it. And in many cases, all I need is an honest response as to why they can't or what is keeping them focused (i.e. their needs). But constantly people just act as if not answering you, ghosting you, etc is an ok practice. I don't tolerate it. And neither should anyone. The easy route isn't actually that easy. We live in a world where honesty is somehow shied away from, and vulnerability a weakness. If you are trying to be nice but you take someone's time, realize too their time is precious just like yours and your responsibility is to be honest to them, even if it's a no. In the past year, I've had: *Three friends opt-in to review a deck for an opportunity they should've loved. After two phone messages and several emails, I still had no response. *Six colleagues agree to hear about my start-up, review my pitch deck, and talk to me about it, and then simply not respond back with a "yes, no, or not now." *One person ask me for two hours of my time in person, reschedule it twice, and then have the nerve to be aggressive to me for being clear they didn't respect my values or my time. The analogy of the wound is clear to me, because I remember who those people are. I remember the time taken and the fact I had to chase to get no answer. This is what festers, because by taking the stance of no response, someone is demonstrating their disrespect of the process. And clearly my lack of value to them. But what invariably happens, especially because the Orchestrated network has insane connectivity? They come back to me, and act like nothing has happen. I ask them to own up to their lack of action, otherwise we can't move forward. Some do. The others..well it is what it is.

🩺 Right before I started working at The Next Door Recovery as a detox nurse (almost 8 years ago), I read "The Four Agreements". It was incredibly insightful for both my personal and professional life. 🤍 Here’s a summary of these powerful principles and how they can enhance our work in recovery: ✨1. Be Impeccable with Your Word: Communicate with honesty and compassion. Your words can offer comfort and build trust with clients and colleagues. Gossip can tear down a team and breeds toxic work culture. Words have power, so use them to empower others, not tear them down. Use your words to promote positivity. ✨2. Don’t Take Anything Personally: Understand that clients' reactions are often reflections of their struggles (fear and pain), not a reflection of you. Stay empathetic, graceful and grounded. ✨3. Don’t Make Assumptions: Always seek clarity. Ask questions to fully understand clients' needs and ensure effective collaboration with your team. Ask the “why” behind the “what” if you don’t understand. ✨4. Always Do Your Best: Embrace every task with your full heart and effort. Your dedication can make a significant impact, even on challenging days. We all have hard days but at the end of the day, you can avoid self judgment and regret if you’ve done your best for that day. Extend Grace. These agreements have been a guiding light over the last few years and while I don’t practice these with perfection, I see significant benefits when I am able to apply them to my life both personally and professionally. 🌟 #TheFourAgreements #RecoveryWork #ProfessionalGrowth #CompassionateCare

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is put yourself on your own to-do list. Who else can relate? All this talk about “putting on your own oxygen mask first” or “filling up your cup first” can feel very empty. Especially when it's not acknowledged HOW HARD it actually can be to put your own needs anywhere on a priority list. It can be really difficult. It can feel really uncomfortable emotionally to make space for your own needs. You can be fearful of saying “no” to something and what people might think of you. It’s not easy. But it's worth it. You will show up better for all the things you care about when you can do it from a place of wholeness. Or even just showing up from a place of being fed, showered, rested and emotionally stable will make things work more in your favor. (I’m looking at you moms and nurses😉) So I invite you today to do this one simple thing. Put time on your schedule for lunch, breaks, and something you enjoy. Even if its 5 minutes at time. Decide when you are going to take care of yourself. Small moments matter. It's brave to prioritize yourself. It’s hard. It's can be uncomfortable to start. But nurses do hard things. All the time. And this hard thing is soooo worth it. I’m cheering you on in the middle of the messiness of change.

Last week, I was privileged to nurse a woman during labour till delivery and the scene of that moment is not fading away anytime soon. The labour pain was so intense that we couldn't help but pray that the baby would come on time. I was sober, the woman was most sober and her husband was the best being. At that time one could only imagine how painful it could be for her. Reassurance and constant monitoring were the only treatment offered to her at that point. This kind of pain cannot be concealed. 🥹 But guess what, the baby didn't come out until the full course of labor was completed. Even while the head was presenting, we had to wait for contractions to help her push through. (This shows the importance of patience and endurance in whatever we find ourselves ) The end was gracious, a life was birthed and I'm glad I was a source of hope. It's amazing how God designed nature, certain processes can never be boycotted. Here's the real gist; 🫄We are pregnant beings and anticipating our delivery time. But until the full course of labour is complete we won't deliver. 🫄🏽 While you are at it, you need to find physical, spiritual, and psychological support as that could be a strength draining and a self losing time (Not in the right frame of mind to do things yourself). 🫄🏽 Peradventure you find yourself in the position of a nurse or the husband in this scene above, do not hesitate to encourage and uplift the spirit of the one who is travailing. Your kind words are the only medicine an individual could make do with at that moment. Dearest #Linkedinfamily, I pray you have a soft landing in your travailing time and come out of it with praise, and may you be a source of hope and comfort to travailing ones. It's another fulfilling week again, God help me through it. Happy new week! Kindly share your thoughts on this in the comments. I'm #ThatAffableNurse, I bring good things your way. I am open to collaboration, writing, and transcribing gigs, speaking engagements, moderating, and ambassadorship for health & wellness brands. Reach out to me if you need my expertise. 📸. Prep. for operating the Autoclave ( A process in sterilization of instruments.) #LinkedIn #Linkedinnurses #Nurse #Mondaymotivation

Bronnie Ware is an Australian nurse 👩⚕️ who cared for palliative care patients who were in the process of dying. Over time, she has captured insights from these individuals under her care. Notably is her book, “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. “ One regret highlighted is having the courage to live a life true to yourself rather than what others expect. I can resonate with this as I’m sure many of us can, in some aspect of our life. I sometimes think of those “shock and awe” life moments where I “woke up” only to realize how off course I really was. 🩷 For many of us, it can often take these unexpected, sometimes heart-wrenching moments to reconnect with our truest selves. And in these moments, we are often painfully reminded of how short life can be and a drive towards purpose can rise up within us. This must be similar to the patients Bronnie cared for - a realization of what is most important in life. Here is the difference, her patients were dying. They experienced a regret that they could not undo. How about for us? What if we chose TODAY to make one step towards having the courage to live a life that is true to us, regardless of what others expect of us? If you are already there, I am so happy for you! Stay the course! If you still desire to drum up the courage to live your truest life, you are in the right place. In fact, if you want more support, I’m doing a training this Friday on the “3 Steps to Identify and Overcome the Fears” that may be holding you back from a career that feels like home. I would love to have you join me! If interested, say “COURAGE” in the comments below or DM me and I’ll send you the link! 🌿 . . . #dawnlaraecoaching #midlifewomen #Ageless #genxwoman #inspiringwomen #careersuccess #careergrowth