Lift Others Up! Core Value #1

Last week, I wrote about defining our core values and how important that is. Our core values help us determine:

• how we show up in the world
• how we make decisions
• what kind of company we work for
• which clients we work with
• what we say "yes" to; what we say "no" to

I’m in the process of refining my own values and those of JustGotPromoted.com.

But the first one is pretty clear to me. It’s the one thought that’s always on my mind: Lift others up!

Who has lifted you up?

Take a moment to look back on your life. Think about the people who’ve helped you get to where you are today.

Who has lifted you up?

Close your eyes for a moment… see whose face pops up.

It could be a parent, a grandparent, a favorite teacher, a sports coach, a family friend…

A brother, a sister, an uncle, or an aunt... In some cases, it may have even been your manager at work. It might even be somebody you’ve never met who's inspired you…

What did all those people have in common? They lifted you up, but how?

What does it take to lift others up?

They cared about you. They saw your potential and tried to move you toward it.

They led by example and put themselves in the position of being a role model.

Not just by what they said, but by what they did…by their actions…their way of being… The way they listened to you and were mindful of your needs…

The way they focused on your well-being…

They showed up with the intention of helping you be better…

Making the world better, their community better, their team, their company, their neighborhood…

That’s the kind of leader I aspire to be.

And that’s the kind of leader I hope that the folks in our community aspire to be.

If you’re with me on this, then think more about that specific person who made a difference and jot down a few notes about them.

• What was it they said or did that lifted you up?
• How did they show up for you?
• How did they care?
• What did they not do?
• How did they listen?
• Did they believe in you…perhaps even more than you believed in yourself?

For me, it was Eric

In my case, several people come to mind, but one of the first that pops up is a professor I had in college named Eric. In my first couple of years of college, I wasn't really dedicated to my studies.

I was more interested in having a good time. And I was pretty good at that.

Up to that point, learning and studying and doing homework and taking tests and things like that had always felt like a burden that was introduced from the outside, not something that was aligned with my natural motivation and curiosity.

One day, in an Intro to Psychology class, somebody in the back row asked Eric a question, and Eric said: "You’ll have to speak up! I’ve seen The Who in concert too many times. I can’t hear you."

And I thought to myself, “Wow, Eric saw The Who live!”

So, I stopped by his office one day to meet him. He was always there with his door open around 5:00 or 6:00 pm, and I dropped in that first time to talk about music. He’d seen The Who, Led Zeppelin, all kinds of amazing bands. Then he says to me, "But you know…my biggest regret was that I didn’t go see Bob Marley when I had the chance."

I thought, “Man, this guy is cool.”

So, from then on, I would drop by and talk to Eric about once a week.

Eventually, we started talking about life. About goals. About learning and growth. About the work he’d done to get to where he is. About love. Parenthood. Whatever.

And all of it from a perspective informed by Psychology and Behavioral Neuroscience. It was way better than classes and books. Eric always had time for me.

He was never looking at his watch. Never had to rush out. He was always willing to put his other tasks aside and be present with me.

He always listened and cared.

He was funny. He was accessible. He came across as an equal, as a friend. A confidant. And he genuinely seemed to enjoy being with me.

A great mentor believes in you before you believe in yourself.

Even though I wasn’t such a good student, he gave me the opportunity to be the preceptor in his “Brain, Mind, and Behavior” course and a course called “Drugs and Society.”

As preceptor, I was responsible for leading review sessions before exams, checking assignments and tests, holding office hours to help the Intro to Psych students, and other various support tasks that were needed in the course.

Not sure if it was his plan, but he’d used the old trick of having the problem student become the hall monitor and be responsible for cleaning the blackboard and lining up the desks.

Eric didn’t think I was a slacker or an unserious student…even though I was. He believed in me more than I believed in myself.

And through that process, I really began to care about what I was learning and to think of myself differently.

He lifted me up.

And twenty years later, I can still feel the impact of the positive influence he had on me.

Pay it Forward

So, now that we’ve thought about our uplifting person, let us think for a moment…

How can I show up today to be that person for somebody else?

And if your person is still living…send them a thank you note today and let them know how much you appreciate them.

I’m going to be forwarding this one to Eric right after I hit send to all of you.

Have a great weekend, everybody!

And lift others up!

In service to you,

Matthew

PS- Write me back to let me know what you think, who that person was for you, or what you've got going on this weekend!

I love hearing back from you and really hope to get to know each one of you while our community is still small and intimate. Thank you!