In my quest for the yes, how I learned to say (and accept an occasional) NO!

"How do you do it all?" I often get asked this question. My response is simply, "I learned to say no." This is usually followed by a puzzled, "huh?" I go on to explain, as entrepreneurs, we're often tasked with doing everything. We can be CEO in the morning and by the end of the day, head janitor. In the age of A.B.C. – ‘Always Be Closing,’ or chasing the bag, we're programmed to never accept “no” for an answer. But as much as we hate to hear no, it's even harder to say no.

In the past, hearing "no" would feel like a personal attack. But, often, it was a sign that I wasn't ready for the opportunity, I needed to refine what I was doing or I could've practiced more (practice only makes s*%t tighter). Now, when I hear no, I can smile and thank them for their time because I know something even bigger is on the way.

Saying no was just as hard because it felt like I was disappointing someone or giving the impression that it was something I couldn't handle or I was being selfish (maybe a little). In actuality, it's a luxury to have the ability to be selective about how you allocate your time and what you commit to. I learned to avoid words like "I might" or "maybe" unless I truly planned to spend time thinking about it. I recently saw a quote that read, "You can do anything, but you can't to everything." It resonated with me because I've turned down many opportunities when I didn't think it was a good fit or it coincided with something else that I wasn't willing to change or reschedule. I got over 'decline remorse' and learned to move on.

Obviously, some things require shuffling in order to make it happen and get things done. But, in this day of health (mental, physical and emotional) being prioritized as much as financial wealth, I choose my health and, ultimately, my best self (this flexibility is one of the reasons we become entrepreneurs, right?). Fortunately, another opportunity usually comes along that's a better fit (and sometimes bigger than the one I gave up).

Whether it’s no to family, friends and colleagues, no to a bad business deal, or, no to a speaking engagement, learning to be intentional about my time and saying no has been the secret to being more productive and my staying sane.