Never be the First to Respond in a Negotiation

The secrets of successful dealmaking to get every dollar you deserve

The first rule of negotiation is that the first person who speaks loses. So what do you do when asked, "What do you want to get paid?" The last thing you want to do is to say a number that's too high, or worse, too low that you get stuck with. So, if you get asked this question, here are some things you can do to help ensure that you don't leave money on the table?

1. Do Your Homework

For instance, there are volumes of salary information and surveys that employers use for a job negotiation to establish the average market rate for compensation for every job. In most cases, if you show up for an interview, the employer already knows precisely what the job you're applying for is worth. They know as much information as you do.

2. Understand the Company's Philosophy

Every organization has its philosophy on compensation. While many companies may end up paying people on a standard distribution curve--which may be right at the average or median point--others may choose to pay under or even over the median.

For instance, I worked for one company whose strategy was to pay 50 percent below the market average. But they also paid a generous bonus that could push a person's compensation toward the top of the market. The big difference was whether the company paid a bonus that year or not. Fortunately, while I was there, we always made big bonuses.

3. Set Expectations

Once you have done your homework to understand the market rate for your skill and the general philosophy of the organization you are applying to, you're ready to answer the question if someone asks you what you want to be paid.

One response might be: "I know you know the market in this geography better than I do and that you want to pay fairly to retain your employees. I also understand that you have your organizational philosophy regarding pay relative to the market rate. So, based on my experience and skills, I am just looking to be paid fairly and appropriately."

4.  Flinch, Reflect, and Go Silent

The key is NOT to say any specific number but to let the company/recruiter make the first move. This is where it pays to understand the negotiating strategy of flinch, reflect, and go silent.

I happened to coach a young man who recently implemented this strategy. A recruiter for a new position contacted him. In his current job, he was making $125,000 a year. When the recruiter interviewed him, he used the techniques I outlined above when asked how much he wanted to get paid. At first, the recruiter said the new position paid $150,000. But then this young man flinched, reflected, and then went silent. (Look down or reflective but do NOT smile)

Within just a few moments of silence, the recruiter bumped up the offer to $175,000. At that point, he knew that was a fair offer, so he accepted the job.

5. Bringing Home the Bacon

To ensure you don't leave any money on the table, start by doing your homework to understand what the market pays for your position and how the company typically you want to work for pays. After that, it's all about turning the negotiation in your favor by flinching, reflecting, and going silent.

If you can pull that off, you're well on your way to earning every dollar you deserve.