When Is It Too Much?

When is pressure, self imposed or brought on externally healthy and when is it too much?

I've always been a very driven person. I've worked tons of hours in order to achieve at a high level. I didn't try to compete with others. The competition was with myself to do better, leave nothing undone for the day and be perfectly prepared for tomorrow. In the 1980s I worked for a company that was very goal oriented. That's probably an understatement. They were maniacal. Unfortunately it was an atmosphere that I thrived in because it drove me further to do well. My work weeks turned into marathons. I traveled extensively in addition to working long hours. My health was dramatically effected resulting in ulcers, sleeplessness due to other severe gastric problems, anger and more. 

I worked for ITT Financial during the entire decade of the 80s starting off as an Assistant Branch Manager, rising quickly through the ranks and being promoted to a VP position responsible for 30 California branches, 300 employees and $200 million in assets. I was pretty proud of myself. This was all accomplished before the age of 30. In retrospect I performed very well but wasn't ready for the challenges that I faced. The positions opened up and I earned promotions because of ridiculously high turnover. Our reputation for that was known industry wide and professionals that were probably more qualified for leadership positions working for competitors would not dare work for us. You see, it was the pressure and what it did to us.  

Near the end of my tenure everyone at my position in the company (26 of us) was summoned to an emergency meeting called by the President of our company. We were facing regulatory scrutiny, the President's job was at risk and the already enormous stress became unbearable. On the flight there an associate began to panic. He was breathing heavily, ran his hand thorough his hair and large clumps came out. We were friends and about the same age. It was tough to comfort him but he finally settled a bit. It hit me that this wasn't a tenable situation Without boring you with too many details, our meeting with the President was the next day. I ended up having a disagreement with him and was relieved of my position. I was the 11th of 26 to leave that position in 1989 and it was a relief. You see, I would have never quit, just worked more trying to solve problems, taking on more responsibility and causing my health to deteriorate further. Thankfully I've never been on a plane flight again with someone experiencing life threatening stress or felt it myself.   

It was over 10 years before I again accepted a leadership position with any firm due to the effects of this portion of my career. I leaned that no job is worth sacrificing my health, that it's time to slow down when I find myself fatigued or irritable and that no company puts my well being above profits or the personal agenda of my superiors. I owe it to my family and myself to remain healthy, happy and to put us ahead of everything else. Hopefully most of you aren't involved in this type of work environment but remember this story the next time that you are not willing to consider a position  that may be better for you. You see, I told myself that I was happy too.