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The secret life

The inside story of what the world of work is really like
  • The secret life of an extra: illustration by Michael Driver.

    The secret life of an extra: don’t talk, don’t eat and don’t go home till 2am

    Anonymous
    Working as a supporting artiste is not as glamorous as it sounds. At the mercy of the weather, you might not make the final cut – or much money
  • santa

    The secret life of Father Christmas: chats about poo and requests for a sibling

    Anonymous
    For 10 years I’ve donned the red costume, beard and wig for my festive alter ego, Santa Claus. It’s hard work and not great pay, but a happy child’s smile is priceless
  • Michael Driver illustration for The Secret Life of a social worker

    The secret life of a social worker: you just have to get used to letting people down

    Anonymous
    The poverty we encounter these days is the worst we’ve seen– it’s a race to persuade everyone to pull together to keep our families afloat
  • Illustration of a librarian

    The secret life of a librarian: What have I found in books? Streaky bacon and used condoms

    Anonymous
    I set out determined to change the world of public libraries. Nearly 40 years on, I’ve only made the smallest dent. But I’ve met some amazing borrowers along the way
  • Michael Driver illustration

    The secret life of a landlord: leaking showers and an illicit porn shoot

    Anonymous
    I feel a twinge of guilt owning numerous homes, but it’s been my life’s work. My love of period properties offsets the never-ending daily drudgeries
  • Illustration by Michael Driver.

    The secret life of a clickbait creator: lousy content, dodgy ads, demoralised staff

    Anonymous
    It wasn’t anyone’s ideal job, but during my time at a viral website, I repurposed other people’s content then harvested your data to sell on
  • Illustration by Michael Driver for the secret life of an oncologist.

    The secret life of an oncologist: witnessing the most painful and intimate moments of life

    Anonymous
    It’s not all doom and gloom. The best part of the job is when cancer treatment works and patients return to good health. Occasionally there are miracles
  • Illustration for the secret life of a tax adviser by Michael Driver.

    The secret life of a tax adviser: it’s not about devising fancy avoidance schemes

    Anonymous
    I enjoy my job, although dealing with HMRC can be frustrating and I get annoyed by clients who’d rather listen to their golf club pals than pay for proper advice
  • Illustration by Michael Driver for a secret life of a singing teacher

    The secret life of a singing teacher: it’s like being a cheap therapist

    Anonymous
    The quality of singing is variable, but I enjoy helping clients improve themselves. Every lesson is different – and there are some really fantastic moments
  • Secret life of a theorist physicist. Illustration by Michael Driver

    The secret life of a physicist: moments of transcendence offset by months of confusion

    Anonymous
    Having to move position so regularly means there is little stability, but there is something special about uncovering nuggets of universal truth about the cosmos
  • Illustration by Michael Driver.

    The secret life of a GP: a family doctor is there for everyone else’s before their own

    Anonymous
    The best thing about my job is the patients. I could do without the doctor-bashing in the press, though
  • Illustration by Michael Driver

    The secret life of a supermarket manager: My store feels like a second home

    Anonymous
    I get up every morning at 4.30am to check the deliveries have arrived, the bakery is up and running and the fruit and vegetables are fresh
  • The secret life of a child therapist

    The secret life of a child therapist: you have to accept you can’t fix everything

    Anonymous
    Getting a child with mental health problems to open up is a big ask. If only there was more compassion for struggling families
  • The secret life of a startup employee. Illustration by Michael Driver

    The secret life of a startup employee: it’s like being a firefighter led by an arsonist

    Anonymous
    If you’re lucky, new ventures can be fun, and do great things. But most are rudderless, stuffed with clueless children – and founded by capricious narcissists
  • parliamentary advisor2

    The secret life of a parliamentary assistant: my Commons pass felt like the key to Hogwarts

    Anonymous
    The Palace of Westminster might be falling to bits, but it’s still an incredible place to work – full of living, breathing history
  • Illustration by Michael Driver

    The secret life of an anaesthetist: if surgeons are the blood, we are the brains

    Anonymous
    During an operation, your life is in our hands. But despite the highly sensitive role we play, we are all but invisible to our patients
  • Illustration of a man driving a lorry

    The secret life of a truck driver: at the sharp end of what the EU means, I want out

    Anonymous
    I love the solitude and hearing the bands I drive play live. But trouble in Calais and beyond means it isn’t all fun and games
  • Illustration by Michael Driver

    The secret life of a corporate responsibility director: I point businesses towards their moral compass

    Anonymous
    My job title sounds wishy-washy even to me – but it’s important to persuade companies to behave ethically. Which they will, if it makes them money
  • Army officer illustration

    The secret life of an army officer: I’m a liberal who wouldn’t vote for war

    Anonymous
    As a professional soldier, I can balance my personal outlook with doing what duty demands. But as cuts hit, it’s getting harder by the day
  • The secret life of an organiser

    The secret life of an organiser: I clear my clients’ physical and emotional clutter

    Anonymous
    Many of them are so overwhelmed with belongings that they’re on the verge of a breakdown. I advise them to simplify and let go. It’s transformative
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