Man with a pram
Stuart Heritage on the joys and challenges of being a new father
Stuart Heritage: I could sit and watch you all day – sometimes I do
In his last Man with a Pram column, Stuart Heritage writes a letter to his young son. It’s time for them to find a new adventure
Flying with a baby? It’s a piece of cake
I was dreading boarding a plane with our son, but it was so easy that I think someone at immigration actually smiled at us
A nap with my son beats transcendental meditation
And I get to listen to podcasts at the same time, which I suspect the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi might have frowned on
My son is perfect and if you disagree, you’ll regret it
My wife is Spider-Man, so she’ll know if you’re judging our child. And she’ll tell me – and I’ll become obnoxious
Parents have a bizarre need to know that they and their children are the best
When my son took part in a psychology experiment, I kept pestering the researchers to find out how well he was doing – and how much better than other babies
My wife and I have got our evenings back at last
But this great expanse of baby-free time needs filling – so will it be booze or TV?
Ah, the simple joy of defiance – my son’s new phase
Smashing the remote control, hurling food – unless we want to raise another Kanye West, we’ll have to get down to discipline
Forget about idealism. My motto is ‘whatever gets the job done’
Idealism suggested our son should only play with wooden toys because they foster the imagination. That was doomed to fail – they make a lot of noise when thrown
Cutting out swearing is an extreme lifestyle change for me
… but I have to stop for the sake of my son. It’s inevitable that he’ll be corrupted at some point, but I don’t want to be responsible for it
Night terrors: ‘His eyes were open but he wasn’t awake’
My son woke up at 11.45pm and screamed until his throat was raw at 3am. Just when you think you’ve got all the answers to parenting …
How can my son be a year old already?
He’s growing up fast, leaving milestones in his wake – and tiny parts of me along with them
One day our son will draw a picture of his parents at work – two angry slobs shouting at a printer in their pants
It’s been a tricky time for both of us, but it’s over
My baby has ruined culture for me
He took his first steps during a Disney film that I’m doomed to remember for ever and any song I heard during the first week of his life – however bad – makes me cry
I have a secret to confess about my parenting skills
I’ve been keeping it from you for 49 weeks, but it’s a new year so I’m going to share it
For the first time in my life, people need me – and I’m loving it
With my dumpier looks and stain-proof clothes, having a baby has mutated me into an adult at last
Christmas isn’t baby friendly – though I see an upside to the festivities
Through the vortex of Christmas rituals, our son has pulled my family closer together
I’m doing proper dad stuff with my son – watching TV
This is just what I imagined when my wife told me she was pregnant
My life as a boozer is over. Why drink when I can sleep?
It’s no fun changing a nappy with a hangover. Besides, the little fella means more to me now than getting drunk
My son’s gums have dropped
I’m not sure if dropped gums are a thing, but my mum said it with the wisdom of a village shaman
My son’s new fake laugh is terrible – a sea lion choking on a fishbone
He’s polishing up his attention-seeking skills and techniques
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