Mom said I can play the xbox now

So there’s this Instagram thot who I’ve literally lost liters of semen to. I found out she’s selling her bath water so I knew I had to buy some no matter the cost. I ordered a bottle for $30 and received it in a few painfully long business days. When I received the package, I stripped naked and chugged the holy nectar in seconds. I was not prepared for what happened next. My swollen testicles instantly detonated and left me in a puddle of flaming children. It felt like Belle Delphine was ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ me from the inside out. I knew I had to get more.

yeah dude i love the 80s, i listen to synthwave all the time. i listened to macintosh plus once, damn man i was born in the wrong generation i miss the 1980s. david bowie? you mean the guy that died a year back? yeah, ac/dc... uhhh... back in black, am i right? europe? never heard of them... ...oh, they made the song "The Final Countdown" ?? oh yeaahh i know them you watch stranger things??? im really stoked for uhhh......... stranger things season two. yeah bro, i love the 80s.

i went to comic con in my marty mcfly cosplay, and i uhhh... had my walkman music player on me...it's a 2002 model though. i wish i had a real 80's walkman. yeah uhhhh... when i grow up i'm gonna buy myself a neon delorean with my parents' money, that way people will know the true extent of my 80s...desires......and i'm gonna listen to synthwave in my neon delorean oh yeah and uhh.... i listen to 80's remixes of modern songs, it really makes me feel like i'm back in those days, heh.

Ukrainian Veteran, also served in the Chungking wars... Good man all round... RIP Earl Dickinson 1974-2077

what the f*uck

soldier, we need you for the upcoming humanitarian mission, quick! send your social security number!