How do you manage conflict in your industry?

As the founder of a relationship health company, conflict management is one of the first things we focused on in our product (a product that heals relationships). Here’s what we found: At the center of every conflict is an unmet emotional need. This can come from one side or both sides. Therefore, the first step towards conflict resolution is understanding the underlying emotional needs at play. I have found this to be true of all relationships, whether in the workplace, at home, or in life. As a facilitator trying to bridge the gap between two sides, your first goal is to understand the unmet emotional needs. This should happen in two separate 1-on-1’s first. Once you clarify these, you can develop a path forward.

Negotiating conflict involves negotiating complexity. The higher the situational uncertainty and relational disagreement, the higher the complexity. It’s more useful to: First, up relational certainty - I know this is what I think/feel/want for me/you/us…. - I don’t know what I think/feel/want about X yet…. - can you help me understand more about what you think/feel/want….? Then, up situational certainty - I know this about the situation (facts + opinions about facts) - I don’t know these (facts + opinions about facts) - Can you help me see (what you know/ not know/want to know)? Clarifying relational and situational data helps alleviate some distrust/ confusion so you can set up a stronger foundation to negotiate shared interests.

In my experience as a Senior Project Manager, the most detrimental types of conflict that hinder project success are resource, schedule, and communication conflicts. Not having enough human capital to complete the project or going over budget are typically symptoms of communication conflicts with the key stakeholders, technical team or even vendors. As a result, schedule conflicts such as missed timelines arise.

“Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional.” — Max Lucado To manage conflict in the industry, address issues promptly and objectively. Facilitate open communication to understand different perspectives and seek common ground. Employ mediation techniques and involve neutral parties if necessary. Focus on problem-solving rather than assigning blame, and foster a collaborative environment where solutions are prioritized over personal grievances. Regularly review conflict management processes to ensure effectiveness.

As a Leader, you must ensure to proactively prevent any conflicts from happening. My formula is; 1- Address the Why, What and How 2- Team's focus on the eventual goal 3- Sell the vision to address "what is in it for me" 4- Encourage everyone to share their ideas 5- Create task forces each having their own domain and tasks 6- Empower the team to take initiatives and put challenging questions. Making myself accountable to the wider team to set an example 7- Put the right person for the right role based on skill sets not seniority or affiliations 8- Ensure transparent communication, ensuring everyone knows who is doing what to avoid conflicts 9- Flexible and open to constructive feedback and adapt accordingly 10- Build trust & show empathy

Formula is simple; 1- Identify the root cause and act 2- Communicate clearly without taking sides 3- Build trust 4- Change the environment - where the conflict happened. (In my personal experience, an argument occurred whilst on a conference call, I immediately put a hold on the proceedings, invited the 2 parties involved for a cup of tea outside the office. During our meet up, I refrained from speaking about the conflicting subject, we spoke about our lives, hobbies, food etc. A few hours later, the meeting was reconvened and the atmosphere was much more forgiving and collaborative. This goes to show that any conflicting situation could be resolved by allowing others to express themselves and having a clear, honest discussions.

Recently, I had to put in place a new CRM system, and since the team had been using the old CRM for so long, I knew there could be conflicts. To solve this, I called a meeting and invited everyone to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of the present CRM. The discussion concluded that the drawbacks outweighed the rewards. After this beneficial debate, I shared my ideas for the transition in addition to the company's goals. By expressing my viewpoint, I was able to persuade the team to rally around both my leadership and the overall company's aim. This method not only demonstrated the justification for the change, but also the advantages of adopting it. Finally, this strategy was effective in securing the team's support and alignment.

Build the team on solid foundations. Nurture and mentor them. Identify the talent and delegate accordingly. Promote an empathetic culture of mutual respect, tolerance and trust. Actively engage in meaningful conversations. Promote open communication. Respect people's opinion and feedback. Let the team feel that their voices are heard. Provide equal opportunities to diffuse conflicts and tensions.

Conflicts can be uncomfortable and requires work to resolve. If you are not prepared to invest the work (avoiding), the conflict is likely to remain as well.