A recent comment-conversation with Adelina Chalmers brought up a lot of thoughts for me. I had listed out some of my flaws in leadership in response to her post, and she had asked what brought me awareness of them. As I was thinking of my reply, this is what occurred to me:
Awareness wasn’t my problem.
We all have our blindsides, but I had a pretty decent level of self-awareness of my failings even in my youth, and I don’t think I’m alone in that among technologists. We tend to be an introspective sort of group (I’m not saying high-ego biased techs don’t exist 😄 just understand that I diligently self-selected out of their company).
The trouble for “my type” is how we think about our struggles. We wonder if mistakes are a sign we are hitting the limit of our capacity, rather than simply seeing them as poor strategy that is very very fixable. We don’t think to seek help for our problems (because who wants to hear us complain anyways?? Better to just get back to work...). And since so many avoid publicly discussing their struggles to protect their rep (understandably) it can feel like no one else has the problems we do. This drags out our growth for way longer than it needed to be - sometimes stalling it out entirely.
How did I get here then? A lot of coaching - both being coached and coaching others - is what shifted this attitude for me, and I want it for others. So hell yes I’ll post about the things I’ve gotten wrong if I think it could catch the eye of someone who needs to see it, and maybe they’ll think “If this crazy person had similar challenges to me, and she can happily (and authentically) talk about it and move past it, maybe I’m not at the limit of what I can do.” You aren’t.
Tech is in a difficult place right now. Layoffs. AI fears. Frontend holy wars (they didn’t want backend having all the fun, I guess?). And leadership roles are now seen as a tar pit best avoided because you’ll get sucked emotionally dry, disappoint peers or loose technical relevance and dead-end your career.
You know who worries about this stuff? People who care. You know who we need in tech leadership more than the ego-maniacs and the ladder-climbers? People who care.
Not everyone wants to do a leadership path, and I absolutely get that. Not every leadership problem can be fixed with advice and #mindset🌈✨. But I believe we are loosing great people for entirely avoidable reasons right now.
I’d love for us to start showing that building teams can be just as great as building systems. That the work to build leadership skills can actually improve how you live life in ways that learning typescript simply can’t come near. I’d love for current/aspiring tech leaders to see that there is support available that is 100% in their corner, and that it’s worth the work and investment to find a coach. Reach out! Let’s talk about what you have going on, and if I'm not the right fit I can refer you towards someone who might be.
Techstars
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