Who am I?
What do I do?
What gives me my identity?
A set of deep questions for a Friday afternoon, but they've been brewing for a while, and they've come to the fore following some conversations with Andrew Barrett, Ben Goodheart, Ph.D., David Wollage, Ruth Denyer and Claire Hill.
We are the sum of our experiences.
My experiences are many. I grew up in Scotland from ages 4-18, joined the RAF as a Navigator (courtesy of the best recruitment film ever - Top Gun) in 1989. I spent 5 years on C-130 Hercules as a Navigator, then did 2.5 years as a staff officer at High Wycombe, 5 months covering Combat Search and Rescue over Bosnia, another 4 years flying as a tactical flight instructor and flight commander, then a one-year MSc in Aerospace Systems, then 2.5 years at QinetiQ as a trials officer on A-400M, then 2 years as a military advisor for Dstl converting 'geek' speak to operational or strategic speak and back again, then 4.5 years in systems engineering and requirement manager at Abbeywood. I left the RAF in 2015, worked in oil and gas, healthcare, and software teaching crew resource management as Human in the System while studying for a Ph.D (which I then dropped), then set up The Human Diver when I realised my passion was in the diving domain and it needed it. Since then, I've taught 2000+ online, 500+ people face-to-face, written a book, produced a documentary, and completed a second MSc in HF and System Safety. I've got around 800 dives, some to 75m using helium mixes and CCR equipment.
I've been married, had two kids, divorced, am married again, and have another son. Moved multiple times. Travelled lots. Done lots of exciting and stupid things. I have been hurt and have had a couple of medical scares.
So what?!
I've had multiple identities and still have multiple identities. This is both a benefit and a disadvantage.
The diversity allows me to see many different things because I have many more 'dots' to join up and patterns to match. I can abstract up and out, and then down and in. The disadvantage is that I am a generalist, not a specialist. So when someone says, 'What do you do?' I struggle to provide a concise answer.
My identity is deeply linked with the diving domain, and to leave that would be very hard (for many reasons). At the same time, I love being in front of people and helping them identify dots, no matter what space, and so I love non-diving work too!
My identity is also deeply linked with the premise that 'I am not perfect until...' (Imposter!!). Listening to 'The Gap and the Gain' brought this to the fore this morning! It is one of the reasons I continually learn. I cannot learn everything, but I am going to try!!, and I am going to try to help others learn too!
It isn't easy to say, "I am worthy for who I am" but that is what happens in my daily journaling: I apply self-gratitude. Not being smug, just recognising that there is a lot of stuff that makes up me, who I am, and what I have achieved.
Who are you?
Industrial Rescue Medic Clinical Practise Tutor
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