High Five, it's Friday!

The High Five is our weekly newsletter bringing you some of our favorite legal (and occasionally illegal) news from the week.  Read this and be the most interesting person at Happy Hour.  Stay sharp, and have a great weekend!

TRESPASSING ICE CUBE GIVES COUPLE JETBLUES

A California couple’s suing JetBlue airlines for $1M after it allegedly gave them the cold boulder. They claim a block of ice the size of a watermelon fell from a flight headed to Los Angeles and landed in their bedroom. Talk about chilling the mood. Court documents say the FAA  suspects the same aircraft dropped ice on another home in Massachusetts six months earlier. JetBlue had reported potable water issues on the plane which apparently can mean, “Did you want some ice with that? Or on that? Or hurled at that?” The couple is suing for negligence and trespassing, since JetBlue didn’t have permission to “let it go” into their home. One of froze things, here...

FTC TO SOUTHWEST: YOU'RE LATE (A LOT)

Cold consolation, but at least JetBlue’s not being sued by the Department of Transportation. Sure, they were fined earlier this month, but it’s Southwest Airlines now feeling the turbulence. The Feds say they’re grounding Southwest with a lawsuit over chronic delays on two of its 2022 flights. With 180 disruptions over five months, most of which were Southwest’s fault, it’s hardly a smooth ride. Freedom to fly – really late? Officials argue that airlines have time to de-ice their schedules when flights are consistently delayed, but Southwest kept booking those flights without making adjustments. That violates the DOT’s unrealistic scheduling rule. Southwest could face over $2 million in fines, leaving their plans to soar struggling for overhead space! Just plane dumb, here...

POISON APPLE? TECH CO MUST FACE GENDER PAY SUIT

Apple’s feeling the Braeburn in California Superior court, meaning the iPhone maker will likely face a potential class action over its alleged policy of paying men higher salaries than women for similar work. Apple sought - unsuccessfully - to pluck the class allegations and several class claims. But the judge took a bite out of that unripened plan, saying there’s a reasonable possibility thousands of female Apple employees experienced something similar to what the plaintiffs claim. They charge that Apple has three rotten policies that appear neutral but perpetuate and widen gender pay gaps. They cite bruises in Apple’s policy on starting salaries, performance evaluations and talent reviews that they claim reward men and penalize women. In need of AppleCare, here...

SPY ON BOARD - GM'S ONSTAR IS TELLING ON YOU

You’ve seen the OnStar commercials – a driver crashes, and a soothing voice promises help is on the way. GM pitches it as a safety feature, but the FTC says OnStar’s been snooping under the hood. The complaint alleges it tracks speeding, slammed brakes, and location, then sells this juicy data to insurers and credit agencies. Busted! Under a proposed settlement, GM and OnStar will hit the brakes on this for five years. They’ll need to steer clear of shady data practices, let drivers take the wheel on their info, and stop sharing with credit agencies. Looks like OnStar’s navigation system just rerouted to Accountability Ave. OnStar and upward, here...

NOO LIKES BUT $27K FOR FIRED SOCIAL MEDIA WORKER

This one kilts us. A woman whose job it was tae poost social media content for National Museums of Scotland got fired fer not dinnae her job. One month she created zero content compared to a colleague’s 73 posts. Spelling errors, grammar mistakes, and missed deadlines happened a’ the time. She failed three performance reviews and each time was given a personal improvement plan (PIP). All three times, she blaw it oot, until they fired her. Despite all that, she won $27K. The judge said while her conspiracy claims were peely wally, her employer should’ve formerly warned her she was gonnae lose her job unless she put some pep in her PIPs. Dinnae get mad, get plaid, here...

Let us know your favorite story in the comments. Oh! And tell a friend!