Letter to myself during this season of change: Our lives are and can be colourful.

My story has been one of #latergram - Always late to conform to societal timelines but didn’t realise that one of the biggest blow was being let go from my role, just months before turning 42. It is my first time - I don’t know what to expect but I know I don’t want another break so I have to find another role, in this economic climate. What fun. These were my immediate reactions. 

Then, I took my all-time favourite advice: Take time (Thanks Roger Pua !). Not rushing to tell my entire network on LinkedIn (all 4,000+ followers here). Not rushing to look for a new job immediately.  

With each new season in life, my biggest lesson is to always have the “player mindset, not the victim mindset” (Thanks LinkedIn and Lionel Sng for the wonderful training!). No work-life balance, met a toxic boss, did not get promoted or simply, no longer enjoying your work - Whatever the situation, take control of it and do what’s right for yourself (and people around or your team). New Zealand Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern took control of her situation when she had nothing left in her tank. It’s not about quitting - it’s about the decision she made for herself and the people following her. She is adopting the player mindset, not the victim mindset. It is not trying to control things you can’t but pursuing things you can in the meantime. 

Instead of rushing, here’s how I took control of my situation:

• Took time to process my feelings

I have always been confident as a person and as a professional - but this situation is totally outside of my control. I told myself I will not let this situation affect how I feel about myself, my achievements and my aspirations. 

While my mind was going crazy managing all the anxieties, deep down I know I’m good at what I do. When I connect the dots in future (Thanks, Steve Jobs), this will eventually make sense. I just need to have faith. So, I told myself I will process this on my own and with my husband first. 

As I process those feelings - it was everything from anger, sadness, injustice, relief, and so many more. So you folks who experienced layoffs were right - I felt EVERYTHING. 

• Took time to tell my trusted circle of people - in comms and outside of comms 

As a strong LinkedIn advocate, I believe in the power of my network. After the layoff, I read too many heartbreaking posts by people who love their companies, their teams to bits, and yet struggling to make ends meet. These don’t add up. Some are still on maternity leave or have a newborn. Others have short term employment visas - it means uprooting their lives if they don’t get the next job fast. I felt my story was ‘less worthy’ and then I started by asking myself - what do I want out of posting about my news? The answer was clear that I was not looking for support online nor looking for words of affirmation. My immediate priority is to look for the next great role. Had to de-couple “support” and “job search’. 

It was in November last year when the news broke. It was the festive season soon then so I took December to share this news with my trusted group of friends in communications - especially my peers in the industry. Hiring was incredibly slow and still recovering from Christmas and Chinese New Year break - but I took my time to put the word out there so that people can help me find my next role. It was humbling and yet, encouraging as friends shared opportunities with me and opened new paths and possibilities for me. I’m hugely blessed and thankful - to friends, recruiters, hiring managers who have invested time in me. You know who you are. Thank you!

• Took time off to reset

My wonderful husband booked us a short getaway to Phuket in Thailand right away - he wanted to bring me and our toddler to a lovely beach destination. The CHANGE in environment was what I NEEDED. 

I read. I chilled. I hugged my daughter. We had so much fun albeit the monsoon season. It cleared my mind and centred my heart. It helped me focus on the most important people and things in life. With this reset, I went on an overdrive hosting and partaking in Christmas and Chinese New Year festivities. It was the social connection and love I needed after three long years of not connecting as big family, as friends. 

• Took time to rediscover my side hustles

Yes - the reluctant entrepreneur right here. My earlier ideas didn’t take off - Remember Project Ms Lee (clothing line) and Project White Parachute (mentoring marketplace)? It boils down to the lack of willpower to start a business, if I may be honest. So I went back to the drawing board. My work mission is to build companies, brands and teams. What is my personal mission? 

I slowly realised that my personal mission is to help people through their seasons - find their voices, bring out their confidence and nurture the beauty within them. Everyone wants to feel good and look great! From the #greatresignation to #greatlayoffs, navigating work and life as a working parent - These have been my seasons. Each season brings me new lessons and inspirations - including this layoff. 

I believe in the power of colours and I LOVE colours. Hence, I’ve decided and begun my journey training to be a colourist as a side hustle - using colours to help people first feel good and look good. Journey with me as I share more again. 

It has been a thrilling break - Seasons will always change (like it or not), but we can be so much more if we take time and use this time for ourselves. Our identities and worth is not defined by our work nor our titles. We are so much more than our jobs - if the recent happenings have taught us anything, this is the least we should do for ourselves. As we adopt the 'player' mindset, this is just another episode that will add colours to your lives, as with mine. Hope this lengthy food for thought will help you in transition.