Reflecting on Pride Month: Perspective on Identity, Equality, and Community

As Pride Month unfolds, it's a chance to reflect onto the progress of the LGBTQ+ community. However, it's also a time for some open discussion about what real pride means, the challenges we face, and the areas where we still need to grow.

Identity. Pride. Identity? Pride?

Identity is a basis of who we are, It is a core sense of what distinct us from each other. It embodies our individualities, sexual orientations, gender identities, social backgrounds and cultures.

During Pride Month, we encourage others to embrace their identities, no matter what their backgrounds are. However, I question the concept of being ‘proud’ of an identity that we are born with. Should we be proud of being different from each other in matters that we do not determine? Should we be proud of belonging to different cultural groups? True pride, in my view, comes from our actions. It is our actions, goals, achievements, contributions to the society and aspirations that make us distinct.

Let’s be genuine: being proud of one’s accomplishments — whether in our relationships with each other, through acts of kindness, professional or personal growth — is far more meaningful. It’s not about the identity itself but about how we exercise it. Simply being proud of who we are, is a pathway to nowhere as it accepts the status quo without encouraging growth and reflection. However, I do not diminish importance of Pride Month by any means.

I rather want to shift the focus from celebrating who we are to celebrating what we do with it.

Inclusion. Isolation?

Let’s address the silent issue: the internal dynamics within the gay community. While the broader LGBTQ+ movement stands fast for inclusivity, there are instances of self-imposed separation. Sometimes it feels that we tend to isolate ourselves from the straight community, creating an unintended divide that feels contradictory to the inclusive spirit of Pride.

For instance, for some, perception of the dynamics of sports teams can differ based on sexual orientation, as some perceive gay teams as less ‘toxic’. However, this separation cultivates 'us versus them' mentality.

As someone who participates in competitive rowing in a ‘straight’ team, I find the idea of seeking out a gay rowing team unnecessary. Rowing, like many sports, is inherently inclusive, welcoming anyone willing to row. When a friend asked if my rowing team was 'inclusive', I was puzzled.

"Eight hearts must beat as one in an eight oared shell or you don't have a crew!" - George Pocock, designer of racing boats

Of course, rowing is inclusive — it incudes everyone who is willing to participate.

However, this question highlighted a broader issue: the assumption of exclusivity itself creates unnecessary barriers. By creating inclusive spaces we presume that all the other environments are non-inclusive, but is it so in reality?

Questioning Norms and Stereotypes

What still blows my mind is the willingness of people to categorise everything. Once you identify as a representative of a certain social group, stereotypes and behavioural expectations are immediately placed upon you. I deeply disagree with this idea. The notion of distinguishing people based on being gay, bisexual, or otherwise is fundamentally flawed—it shouldn’t matter at all what your sexual preference is. I don’t apply stereotypes to myself; I don’t identify myself as ‘gay’ in the context of societal expectations. I resist categorising others as well (unless they want to be put into boxes). Maybe this is the mindset we all need to adopt. Breaking free from rigid categories allows us to see each other more as individuals, not as labels. True inclusivity means moving beyond superficial distinctions and embracing the complexity of human identity.

True inclusivity means feeling comfortable and accepted in any space, whether labeled ‘gay’ or not. Every bar, nightclub, and public space should be inclusive, where everyone feels welcomed. I don’t need a specifically labeled gay bar to feel included; I don’t need a specifically labeled gay sports team to feel included; my comfort arises from acceptance and respect from those around me.

Evolving as Society Evolves

It’s important to recognise that homosexuality hasn’t always been the norm, and our acceptance of it has evolved as society has evolved. However, to keep progressing, we must continually evolve ourselves as well. This means actively challenging stereotypes, questioning our assumptions, and striving for greater inclusivity in all aspects of life.

Personal growth and self-development are crucial in this process. As individuals, we need to reflect on our behaviours and attitudes, embrace change, and work towards becoming more understanding and accepting. This continual self-improvement not only benefits us personally but also contributes to a more inclusive and equitable society.

Living in a non-challenging environment doesn’t contribute to personal growth. Many developed countries provide a relatively comfortable and accepting environment, which, while beneficial, can lead to complacency. Facing and withstanding challenges is essential for personal development.

"Growth and comfort do not coexist." - Ginni Rometty, CEO of IBM

By pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones, we develop resilience, empathy, and a deeper understanding of the diverse world around us.

Pride Month is about celebrating our shared humanity and the diverse experiences that enrich our lives. By fostering inclusivity, we can ensure that everyone feels a sense of belonging, regardless of where they are or who they are with. It’s about critically reflecting on our identities, achievements, and the work still ahead. It’s about recognising the progress made and the journey that still lies ahead.

Identity Amidst the Russian War in Ukraine

The Russian war in Ukraine is a heavy reminder of how important identity is and the extents to which some will go to erase it. As a Ukrainian, this conflict is deeply personal. It’s more than just about territorial disputes or political control; it’s an attempt to erase Ukrainian identity and culture. My identity and my culture. This barbaric effort to suppress nation’s identity underscores the critical need to stand firm in who we are and to defend the rights of all people to live freely.

Just as the LGBTQ+ community fights for the right to be recognised and accepted, we are fighting for our right to exist as a sovereign nation with own unique identity. The war is a powerful illustration of the resilience and strength that come from embracing and defending identity once faced forces that seek to exterminate it.

The fight for LGBTQ+ rights and the fight for Ukraine’s sovereignty are both about the fundamental right to self-identify and live without oppression. It reminds us that the struggle for identity, whether personal or national, is not non-existent and requires continuous effort and resilience.

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.

A Moment to Question

To conclude, Pride Month is not just a time to celebrate our progress; it is also a reminder of the ongoing battles for acceptance and identity around the world. It should inspire each of us to challenge ourselves, to grow, and to support others in their fights for recognition and freedom.

As we honor the resilience and achievements of the LGBTQ+ community and reflect on the broader struggles for identity and acceptance, let’s take a moment to look inward. Are we truly proud of who we are? Are we pushing ourselves to grow, to embrace challenges, and to become better allies and friends?

Consider the words of Ginni Rometty, “Growth and comfort do not coexist” and ask yourself:

Am I stepping out of my comfort zone to foster personal growth and contribute positively to the world around me?

Am I proud of myself?