Reflections: on Amhaud, trauma, and white supremacy

Spaces like LinkedIn, while excellent at connecting people in the ways they were intended, often serve as reminders of how naturally we compartmentalize our feelings and our trauma. As the world experiences the most tumultuous of attacks on our people's well-being, Black people in this country seem to be the ones living a life that most resembles their history of "normal": one where we are exploited, hunted, and killed. And one where we are left to bear the vile grunt of work "necessary to rebuilding our economy."

And amid a global health pandemic, as eyes and legs start to twitch and bodies start to jerk with the excitement that warm weather brings, there are those that decide to go for runs to release the energy that builds up, and there are those who decide to murder the people who go for runs.

There are those who decide to distance, thinking of the people they love the most and the ordinary heroes on the front lines. And then there are those who have learned that they are the least vulnerable to the ghastly effects of this crisis and upon learning this, have chosen their lust for haircuts and beach days to be the fuel that ignites their civil unrest. At what costs? The literal lives of Black and Brown people in this country? The same lives that bigoted capitalists, out of touch elitists, and white supremacists have anointed themselves the power to deem "essential"?

And amid all the chaos, Black, Brown, Asian, Indigenous, poor, working class, disabled, underrepresented, forgotten students are expected to work magic, like we do, and perform at the same level as our peers. All the while figuring out how to healthily acknowledge and recover from newly inflicted and/or generational trauma, let alone how to condense it into an email that guarantees we'll get an extension on that project...

So as we turn our attention away from tragedy, once again, and back to the job search hustle; the latest viral dance; the next dropped single, fight the urge to think that a global health pandemic is the worst thing that could happen to you—it's not; or that you're above social distancing—you're not; or that becoming a hashtag equates to justice—it doesn't.

I wrote When we must demand for justice as a way to acknowledge my feelings (which hurts more than dismissing them, like we've so conveniently been conditioned to do.) All of the views are my own. Reflect with me if you'd like, and be warned of graphic language.

Lastly, remember: the economy can't restart without you; stay home if you can.

#JusticeForAmhaud #RIPAmhaudArbery #RIPSeanReed #RIPBreonnaTaylor #RIPInsertNameHere #BlackLivesMatter #BeingBlackIsNotACrime #EnoughIsEnough