23 Funny Tweets From The Week Because... Uhh... We Need It
"Dates are weird like ok I guess I’ll dress up for my romantic interview" —@goldimocks
Hello, hello! It's me, and it's July!
i like that june 30th finishes on a sunday and july 1st starts on a monday ..... feels like a nice and clean reset full of potential
— it girl (@clowstaff) June 30, 2024
Last week, my timeline was filled with banger after banger of funny tweets...
Someone call them ASAP!!!!! pic.twitter.com/6qcIGU4tqw
— GMZ (@grffn_s) June 28, 2024
...yes, obvi, mainly from that very uniquely American presidential debate.
Give them both a pdf, first one that can rotate it gets to be president
— chunky fila (@chunkyfila) June 28, 2024
Anyway, that's not all that went on! Here are more funny tweets from the crevices of my timeline last week:
1.
Dates are weird like ok I guess I’ll dress up for my romantic interview
— 𝙶 𝚘 𝚕 𝚍 𝚒 𝚖 𝚘 𝚌 𝚔 𝚜 (@goldimocks) June 26, 2024
2.
went out with a guy and texted him in advance telling him i was wearing heels and that i didn’t want to walk too far and he shows up and the first thing he says to me is “THOSE AREN’T HEELS THOSE ARE WEDGES” ok diva my bad 😭😭😭😭
— bella ☭ (@bellanati0n) June 29, 2024
3.
being a new parent is so funny. the other night the baby woke up and his hands were cold so I googled “baby’s hands cold at night” and all the results were like “yeah sometimes babies’ hands get a little cold at night” I don’t know what I expected
— Daniel M. Lavery (@daniel_m_lavery) June 25, 2024
4.
the australian flag is sooo funny. graphic design is my passion ass flag pic.twitter.com/imeLT1puVo
— jorts 🇵🇸 (@ftmensch) June 30, 2024
5.
just got CPR certified if yall know anyone dead or dying tell them hml
— . (@NoEmmeG) June 26, 2024
6.
Just discovered the Alexa recording database which is scary as hell but what’s scarier is what was going on with me on the afternoon of May 5, 2024 pic.twitter.com/lD51lPs4yZ
— grace furby (@gracefurby) June 24, 2024
7.
which chapell roan song is going to be on Obama’s playlist
— Grace (@gracecamille_) June 25, 2024
8.
HELP WHAT DO I DO pic.twitter.com/xJgP24e1Au
— lexi ♡ (@lexalacie) June 26, 2024
9.
My verification code is 304183 And they told me to never share it with ANYONE but honestly i just dont give a fuck any more
— cam (@largemotorcycle) June 29, 2024
10.
I just ordered a bunch of tapas and other dishes in a restaurant in Seville and whilst still ordering the waiter put his hand up and said “enough.” 😭
— Joëlle Thee Editor 🇬🇭 (@Joelle_o) June 26, 2024
11.
imagine her being told she has to scan a qr code to order at a restaurant. pic.twitter.com/OULUCsw1eC
— kat (@joolyholiday) June 25, 2024
12.
13.
how do you text a new friend to hang out without sounding like a democrat asking for money
— preorder MORE, PLEASE (out 7/9/24) (@EmmaSpecter) June 30, 2024
OUR FRIENDSHIP IS AT STAKE IF YOU DO NOT HAVE $5 FOR ICE CREAM! We will never have ice cream again if you don’t act by midnight. Rate how much you like me below:
— Alex Jewell 🧢 (@bestfoodalex) July 1, 2024
GOOD / A LOT / GREAT / YES
Text NO to give up.
15.
Hmmmnnn, Its not normal o😒 https://t.co/9uCLf5vNPh pic.twitter.com/eNWGNOeTUP
— HOT LEGS BIBI🙄 (@ButterBibi) June 26, 2024
16.
Lake Superior hasn't wrecked anyone like this since the Edmund Fitzgerald pic.twitter.com/yEI4JLdH0L
— Ron Sullivan (@ChefRonSullivan) June 29, 2024
17.
Cool https://t.co/6VxoHSLmEw pic.twitter.com/ZcmJyzvMB1
— wengel (@wengelll) June 26, 2024
18.
Imagine making the worst mistake of your adult life in Vegas and opening your hotel blinds to see this pic.twitter.com/WiY0WTCEha
— 7/11 Truther (@DaveMcNamee3000) June 28, 2024
20.
i really love giggling lmao i’m the giggliest bitch you’ll ever meet. a real tee-heer
— ceciATL (@ceciATL) June 28, 2024
21.
social battery running out at the function, call that loosing my yappetite
— lorna shawty (@lornashawty) June 29, 2024
22.
people are constantly tell me i “walk sooo fast” is it illegal to be a girl with powerful legs and a sense of urgency in this life
— CLAUDIA MORALES (@CLAUDIAPOSTING) June 28, 2024
23.
My blood cells watching me pick a scab they spent hours on building pic.twitter.com/Ih5AFxX1Aw
— i make beats ✞ (@DonDadaNYC) June 29, 2024
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