🍺 #Observability is very technical and not quite as delicious as beer. I've been to taprooms, taverns, and breweries all over the world from Portland to Munich to Boston to Tokyo to Prague to Amsterdam to London and beyond. I've never seen a place where the beer is as easily accessible and readily available as in my new concept. 🍻
Imagine lots of fresh beer constantly pouring out of the taps and into mugs and through the drain and into beer storage. When a customer wants a beer, they can either fill up their own glass, grab a new one, or reach under the bar to rehydrate from the storage.
I've been pitching and the haters have quite harsh criticisms:
1) "Wouldn't that waste a ton of beer?" - Nonsense. This is how it's successfully done in the Observability world. All data streams are constantly flowing, at all times, for everyone to consume, just in case. This is the traditional Splunk, Datadog, Elastic, or Dynatrace model after all.
2) "Who would manage the taps and the post-drain beer storage?" - There are numerous services like AWS (Alcohol Without Stress) or GCP (Global Continuous Pints) that handle everything. You just log into a web console and put in some configurations, it's all managed and can scale from a couple gallons all the way up to literal tons of beer. For some enterprise operations it could cost millions of dollars annually, but at least until the end of the month, it's sort of out of sight, out of mind. Just like the Observability bill.
3) "The beer would get stale and flat." - So? It's again similar to #DevOps and #SREs that like to see the most recent metrics, events, logs, and traces. They are most interested in the current availability and performance of production systems but that doesn't mean they don't look at old data.
4) "What's wrong with these pipelines serving individual pints to premium customers and keeping the rest of the beer in pressurized/compressed S3 (Super Special Stein) storage where 100% of it is readily available with on demand access?" - Well, I'll tell you. These pipelines are not good at dealing with people. This new concept is basically a "People Person" that can deal with the customers so engineers don't have to. It's got people skills, it's good at dealing with people, what's wrong with you people?!