The first two photos I’m sharing today are from a life I never thought I’d escape. I was heavily addicted to heroin and a range of other substances, which controlled every aspect of my existence. My days were spent using drugs in various flats around Aberdeen, often with bare floorboards and devoid of basic human comforts. My acquaintances were all people like me - people whose thoughts were so consumed by the need to escape life that nothing else mattered.
My heart still breaks for those people. Many of those I spent my days with are no longer here. No one wants to live their life like that, and each person I met had a story of how they ended up there. Trauma was a common thread - events and pain that were entirely out of their control.
I barely ate, my mental health was in pieces, and I no longer cared whether I lived or died. I saw unimaginable suffering, frequent violence, and the raw reality of life for those who had lost all hope, and who couldn’t see a way out.
For those struggling with addiction in the shadows of towns and cities across the UK, the only focus is making sure you have a constant supply of drugs, to numb the pain and to avoid the unbearable agony of withdrawal. Most are unable to hold down a job, so crime becomes a way of life.
I tried countless times to get my life on track. I went through rehab, attended groups, but each time I found myself slipping back into addiction. It often felt like change was impossible, yet a part of me refused to give up.
In 2018, I made the decision to move away from Scotland. I moved to a recovery community in Italy called Comunità San Patrignano, where I spent 3 and a half years. This was the turning point for me.
The next two photos are of me today. They represent what is possible when hope is reignited.
Today, I have been in recovery for six years. My life is unrecognizable from those dark days: I have my own flat, passed my driving test, bought my first car, and rebuilt my relationship with my family. I have a supportive girlfriend and last year, I launched Nera Luxury Candles to raise awareness of addiction.
I’m happy now in a way I never thought was possible. My mental health and emotional well-being are in a good place. While life still presents plenty of challenges, I now feel equipped with the strength and resilience to face them. I no longer feel overwhelmed or defeated by what comes my way. Instead, I approach life with a sense of hope, confidence, and peace.
Through Nera, I want to use my story to raise awareness about addiction and show that recovery is possible, no matter how hopeless things may seem. My mission is to break down stigma, raise money for addiction services and to create understanding, compassion, and change.
To anyone who feels lost or to those supporting someone who is: Please know that there is hope. Recovery is real, and it is worth it. Please reach out if you are struggling.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story.
