Letter to My 10-year-old Self

Dear Patty (and I think you’re still spelling it with a “y”):

You’re in fifth grade this year and that teacher you have—the one you think will be the meanest—will actually become one of your favorites.  Oh, and Mrs. Spellman from 2nd grade—she will always be one of your favorites too. 

You really want to rush through this last year of elementary school because middle school seems so great.  It’s not.  When you get to middle school, you will suddenly become aware of status—whether that is on the bus or in the hallway, you will become acutely aware of your place in the world and will desperately try to fit in wherever you think you belong.  Which is actually the struggle-you don’t know where you belong.  

You see, the most authentic person you will ever be is who you are right now. You love to make people laugh and tell (or write) a good story, having friends that enjoy you simply because you are nice and make everyone around you feel good.  Right now, that works for you.  Stick with that--life gets a little messy after elementary school and you need to remember that who you are right now is enough.  You will spend a great deal of your life trying to be “more” than those things—you will begin to think that just being nice and able to spin a good tale isn’t enough. But it is.  It’s who you are, it’s what makes you feel good about yourself, and it’s what draws people to you.  

You know when you go with your parents to the Saratoga for dinner (and honestly, you will love going to the Saratoga when you are older) and your dad spends the first 10-minutes just making his rounds saying hello to everyone?  You secretly love that about your dad—and, that is you.  You have every piece of that inside of you.  Don’t ever stop doing that—don’t get quiet, don’t stop talking to EVERYONE (and I mean EVERYONE) and asking them questions, don’t start second-guessing yourself when it comes to how others see you.  

There are going to be several moments in your life where you will want to settle—you will want to say “yes” to a request just because you think there won’t be another coming your way. There will be more “asks”—whether that is from a boy or a job offer, don’t say “yes” just because you think you won’t have another opportunity.  Say “yes” because it is something that brings you energy, it is something that brings you joy, something that makes you feel confident about yourself.  I promise you that the “asks” will be multiple and if you say “yes” to something that doesn’t feel right, you will have to say “no” to something that you really want to do.  And believe me, there will be things you really want to do.  

Life is good, sweet girl—never forget that. Oh, and just two quick things: 

1. Always go to the high school baseball games with your dad.  You will want to stop doing this, but keep doing it.  It will become your bond and will be one of the greatest memories of your life.  
2. You will meet a boy named Dan and you will not like him.  Be kind to that boy…one day, he will ask you to marry him.

Much Love—

Patti (with an i—not sure when you change that!)