Open Letter: Loss and Grief: It’s always at night time when I feel closest to you. When the world finally quiets down, and the sky stretches out above me, I find myself looking for that star that I bought in honour of you. (your star). It feels like there’s more room for us in those still moments, even though you’re not here anymore.
But in some strange way, you’re still with me everywhere I go. As time moves on, I’ve realized how much of you remains alive in me. Since you’ve been gone, I’ve started to see our connection in ways I never could before. It’s funny there were times when we felt distant, yet now I see all the ways we were so alike.
The space you left behind has found a home inside me. It hurts, but there’s comfort in it too. I’m learning, slowly, how to fill that void with love, hope, and life again. When you passed, it felt like a part of me went with you. But over time, I’ve come to understand that the strength I carry now comes from that grief.
Losing you has reshaped me, and though it’s been brutally hard, I’m starting to realise just how strong I’ve become. It’s not easy feeling like you’re still with me, but not being able to see or hold you. It’s disorienting, and it’s lonely. But somehow, that emptiness has built resilience in me, even when the weight of it feels unbearable.
I’ve also had to learn how to reach out. I know now that I can’t do this on my own, and finding the strength to lean on others when the pain becomes too much has been a challenge. #YouAreNotAlone
But I’m learning that real strength isn’t just about bearing it all alone it’s about knowing when to ask for help and accepting that it’s okay to lean on others for support. #ItsOkayNotToBeOkay
I’ll carry you with me forever. I’ll always remember that you lived, that you were loved, and that you loved me. Maybe now I have more love to give because I’m carrying both your love and mine. I’ve found strength in that, even though it’s taken time to understand.
Sometimes I carry you with pain, sometimes with joy, and sometimes with deep gratitude. Often, it’s all those emotions mixed together. I suppose that’s what grief is it shapes us, teaches us to keep going, and gives us strength we didn’t know we had.
I’ll never stop carrying you with me, just like I’ll never stop looking for that star in the sky that feels like a little piece of you watching over me (your star The Guiding Light Mental Health Star).
With all my love,
Ben
#MentalHealth #YouAreNotAlone #Recovery #JustForToday #OneDayAtATime #Grief